My Journey of Physical Healing
In episode 18, Body Awakening, I share my journey of having developed digestive issues 7 years ago that had been getting progressively worse, to the point of barely being able to stay upright. Here I share my process of healing and what it’s taken to regain energy in my body.
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Full Show Transcript
Abby (00:00:00) Hello and welcome to the Mind Body Free Podcast. I’m your host, Abigail Moss. I am a healer. I’m a mentor and guide. I help people to heal their body, mind, and spirit, connect with their passion and purpose, and share their gifts in this world. And today I am back and back after a little break. So thanks. How’s it going? Nice to see you again. Or nice for you to hear me again. I don’t know.
Abby (00:00:30) Anyway, nice to connect. And I just wanted to share a little bit about where I’ve been lately and my journey and what I’ve been doing to help myself heal. So it’s been busy. I’m running a mentorship and an integrative healing coach training right now, which is a lot of fun, really great groups, and amazing people. And with that, I’ve also been doing a lot of work to heal my body. So I’ve been on this journey of emotional healing for quite some time, and that kind of led me into Peru and Ayahuasca and shamanic Chinese medicine.
Abby (00:01:16) Yeah. So desire and the desire to hear led me to Peru and ayahuasca. And then the desire, the burning desire to find my purpose, to answer this calling this feeling that I need to find something more and what I meant to be doing. So that led me down. Shamanic Chinese medicine, Vipassana meditation, linguistic programming, hypnotherapy, a bunch of other tools for healing and letting go of the blocks, the beliefs, and the patterns between my spirit and reality. I guess I could say it that way. Lifting the veil that’s been installed by my mind and the beliefs within the mind and all of the energies attached to that. So that was the initial journey.
Abby (00:02:08) And then a few years ago, the second time I went down to Peru, I was there for two months and I did end up getting a lot of stomach bugs, you know, food poisoning symptoms. I accidentally one time forgot to rinse my toothbrush, not in the tap water, in the purified water instead. So the one time I didn’t do that, I ended up getting quite sick the next day and coincidentally were also in a very long and powerful witch Uma ceremony. And I had been chosen, along with some of the other facilitators, to be in the ceremony and hold space. And I took that job very seriously and I just sat and meditated and witnessed all of them, the wild streams of consciousness from the group floating around.
Abby (00:03:09) And I just acted as a witness, as light like a candle in the darkness, releasing all the stuff that was coming up, hoping to hold space for the shaman, doing her work. And I think with that there is also some spiritual and energetic stuff I may not have fully navigated as well as I could have. Or, you know, I guess I did navigate to the best of my ability at that time. But knowing what I know now and thinking back, that may have been a factor as well. So anyway, I ended up getting sick and I came home from Peru. My digestion, my gut was off. I was also going through a lot of emotional challenges at that time. I was trying to decide which direction I should go in my life, and it was challenging for myself, for my partner.
Abby (00:04:04) And so there’s a lot of emotional distress, which is also very tied to gut distress. And so there is that. And then I went to India, I think a couple of months later, and I got food poisoning there and got sick again. And the gut distress was even worse. And I was just kind of. My diet consisted mostly of carbs in both Peru and India, kind of plant-based, lots of oats in India, lots of fruit. And so leading lots of sugar, so under a lot of emotional distress and had probably also picked up at least one bug and at least one of those countries. So it was all kind of this breeding ground for, you know, pathogens and co-infections within my digestive system and my gut.
Abby (00:04:58) And I came home and just noticed some different things like, oh, I can’t drink alcohol. And maybe that’s just because I’m more spiritual. Now, sugar seemed to bother me more and I would get more tired. And at first, it was like, okay, I can cope with this. I didn’t think too much of it. But as time went on, as the years went on, it seemed to get worse and worse. And I got to a point a little over a year ago where I just decided I can’t. I need to do something about this because I was so tired. And there’s lots of brain fog and just all kinds of problems with digestion. And I wasn’t able to properly function and had very little motivation in my business. It’s very hard to be motivated when your body’s not working properly.
Abby (00:05:51) And so I decided I needed to do something about it. So I learned about Candida overgrowth, what that is. And I looked into the symptoms of it and I just read like I found some great resources online at candidacleanser.com I can drop on the show notes and there is a lot of education there and a lot of videos. People who had been through this experience kind of shared the science of what’s going on and the stages based on your symptoms. And I just really resonated as true in my body of this is something that I’m going through.
Abby (00:06:28) And I felt so hopeful to have finally found somebody who could give me some answers because I had gone to my Western doctor and all of these uncomfortable tests, and they didn’t find anything wrong with me. But I knew there was something wrong with me. And having found this, I felt, okay, I’m not alone. Other people have been through this, are going through this, but there are a lot of people who have gotten better. And this is an actual serious issue. Some people to some people it can be fatal if not treated properly.
Abby (00:07:04) It was validating the experience I was having in my body and it was helpful to have a plan and how to move forward. And it is challenging or it was challenging for those, especially those first few weeks going on something called a candidate diet, which you starve Candida, which is a yeast that naturally occurs in the body, but under the stress and with too many with the stress, with too many toxins, antibiotics, medications, it can mutate into a fungal form and spread throughout the body, creating something called leaky gut and moving through the tight junctions in the lining of the gut and into the bloodstream.
Abby (00:07:56) And then from there it can migrate to other organs and affect them and could even cause organ failure, which if not treated properly. So part of what is involved in healing that is going on is the Candida diet, and that’s a really important step and that’s a diet that essentially starves the Candida of sugar because that’s what it eats. And so it’s a lot like. The Keto diet minus the dairy, because that also feeds Candida. And minus any processed foods or processes are kind of fake sugars. Because with Candida also comes something called leaky gut, where the digestive system becomes very sensitive because food is passing through the gut lining and into the bloodstream and going to places where it doesn’t belong and creating an inflammatory response.
Abby (00:08:51) So the body develops a lot of food allergies and sensitivities. So you have to move into a Whole Foods diet that is kind of really gentle on the gut for some time as that’s healing. So anyway, as you go into this, I went into this diet and like a lot of people experience, there’s this die-off symptom of the Candida dying as well as the Candida starving. So when Candida was starving, it felt like you were starving and you were furious. And because you just want something carbs and it’s a very emotional experience you can get. So I was getting waves of rage, anxiety, or depression, and these are all very common die-off symptoms.
Abby (00:09:37) But if you didn’t know what was going on, it could be very distressing in a way it is already distressing, but it’s comforting to know that this is a natural and temporary part of the process. So I went through that and I started integrating supplements, antifungals, things that would help to kill off the Candida and at the pace as gradual enough that my body could cleanse it out, my liver could cleanse the toxins from that process out of my system. So it is a very big learning process and in many ways continues to be. And yeah, it was very tiring, like more tiring times.
Abby (00:10:21) The body needs a lot of energy to heal. And I felt worse before I felt better. So as I was going through this experience, I was getting rashes on my skin, I was getting ways where I felt dizzy and had to lie down. I spent as many days as I spent just on the couch lying down, able to do little more than that. And those days gradually started becoming less and less able to walk a little bit. I was able to do a little bit more. I was able to work on my laptop from the couch lying down. I was able to do a little more, and a little more and build my business and work with clients.
Abby (00:11:01) And that to me is so fulfilling and so rewarding and purposeful. So getting to do that, even though my health wasn’t the greatest, it was a light in my life and it continues to be a light in my life doing this work. I love it. And with that I did notice eventually I started to plateau so I would do something that my energy would be such a thin line of having just enough where I would go out and I would do something physically strenuous or like moving house physically and emotionally strenuous, just totally wrecked me and I would be back out. And then being a woman and getting my cycle each month, I would just totally wreck me. And so this went on for months and months and months.
Abby (00:11:51) Fast forward to a couple of months ago. I’ve been on this Candida slash keto diet for almost a year. And if I were to go off of it in any way, I just kind of my body reacts, and I kind of regress. So it got frustrating and I felt like, okay, I’m still tired. A lot of the time. I’ve reached this point where I need more help, I need more support. And at around that same time I said, Hey, the universe, I need help, I have something I need to do that is beyond my awareness right now because I have a lot of skills. I am good at emotional healing, really good at shamanic and spiritual healing.
Abby (00:12:33) I know a lot of things and I’ve done a lot of things, but at the same time was I felt like I was inside of this situation, inside of this body, that I couldn’t just work, that something is going on in the body that I needed to listen to and I need to honor and integrate some kind of practice for healing. So at around this time, one of my previous classmates from a kind of shaman school, we were studying shamanic Chinese medicine and medical qigong together, reached out and said, Hey, I want to help you. I wanted to give you these sessions. I saw your post about Candida. I just feel called to work with you.
Abby (00:13:13) So I thought, wow, thank you. Who is, you know, my friend who was also an angel? How beautiful. So I was working with Janette. You know, once a week for. Well, I was working with Jeannette a little less regularly for several months, and then we started working together once a week for two months. And that was beautiful and powerful. It was like 2 hours every week doing this, this remote energy healing session from her. And then she also gave me these exercises to do on my own, these kinds of specialized qigong exercises. And so I know a lot of qigong exercises that I’ve learned that are helpful and powerful engines that have some other ones that she has studied separately because this is kind of this is her world.
Abby (00:14:03) We’re going to have her on soon and let her speak to it. But she kind of lives and breathes qigong and these kinds of exercises. So she taught me these really powerful, really beautiful ones. And when she first showed them to me, I said, okay, that’s great. Wow, I feel this is amazing. Okay, I’m going to do this. And I didn’t do it because I was tired and I was frustrated and I was just angry with life and it is not easier than it should be. Yada, yada, yada. And so. A few months later, we’re doing this work. She gives me some shorter exercises that are also very powerful and I’m able to do a couple of those.
Abby (00:14:43) And I thought, wow, I notice a big difference when I do that. And I thought I should do this. I think doing this every day will help. And then, of course, I didn’t do it for a long time. And then, I thought, okay, there’s a mental block I need to get over because I think the thing that’s stopping me here is me because I need to do my inner work. I need to do these exercises to move forward. So in my coach training class, we do these sort of recorded demo sessions that the students can listen to to get more examples of how different tools can be used. And I asked my husband, who is a life coach, to demo some of these tools with me to help my coach train students.
Abby (00:15:30) And so he coached me on wanting to and on why I wasn’t building up or doing my practice. So in my morning practice, when I get up, I do a bit of yoga, I do qigong, or at least I do these exercises from Janette. And he coached me on that. And if you want to hear it, let me know. I can record it. I can post it in another episode, so let me know about that. But anyway, he coached me on that. I was able to shed some tears of relief, get over this block, and within like 15 minutes. He’s a great coach. Anyway, after that, I thought I was able to get back to my practice because I had a personal healing practice, you know, on and off throughout my life.
Abby (00:16:16) And I had been neglecting it for quite a while and I knew part of my mind now, like I’m being called, to integrate what I know and with my body and to come home into the body. And so I started doing my practice again after getting coached by Dave the lovely Dave Moss. And I started doing these shorter exercises that Jeanette gave me. And they were so sure there are only about 3 minutes per pose. And I had about, I don’t know, like five of them. And so like 15 minutes.
Abby (00:16:57) And I was doing these exercises. They’re very physical like this. It’s just tendons stretching. So just like one of these, pushing your arms out to the side is stretching your middle finger up to the ceiling as high as you can and really opening up the chest and bringing the shoulders back and down. And you’re just kind of standing there with your arms to the side. But when you went for me, when I’m pushing and stretching my tendons, my whole body starts shaking. I feel all this heat pouring off of me. My hands and arms start tingling.
Abby (00:17:27) This is just a lot going on with these exercises because it’s opening up my energy pathways and it’s releasing blockages. And these are the blockages that are causing me to feel tired, to not digest properly, for my body to not function properly. So there are these blockages that have been accumulating for a very long time. And what I was doing in these exercises is opening up and releasing them. So this is not like if you were to see this process, it’s not a pretty graceful yoga flow. It’s hard, it is a shaky process. I’m often moaning or yelling or, you know, breathing heavily.
Abby (00:18:09) It’s messy. It’s like a little exorcism every time I do it. And after I do it, I feel amazing. And so I just started noticing I have energy. I have more energy than I’ve had in years. I can walk. I feel the power in my hips and my core. And I thought, Oh my God, this is so amazing, so amazing to have this sort of energy in my tank when it felt like my tank was just barely running on fumes for years. Because of this whole Peru-India thing that was like seven years ago. So this is the first thing that has impacted the way I feel in my body.
Abby (00:18:51) So it was motivating to do it more. And I started doing it more. And then when I had Energy Trip, my weekly energy session with Jeanette, she said, Hey, you’re able to pull Chee into your body. Now your things are flowing. It’s so different. And like, I know I’m doing the work you gave me to thank that work. But I needed to get over the mental block and to do the work. But now that I am, I’ve been feeling much better. I just feel so much happier. I’m just so overjoyed to be able to have a body that is not, you know, not perfect. It’s not like working 100%.
Abby (00:19:29) But I’ve got the energy to deal with whatever is going on now because without the energy that everything is too much, just too overwhelming the will to even do anything about it. It’s just not there. But with this energy, I can do it. I can deal with anything. I can overcome anything. So with that, I also felt way better emotionally, just emotionally regulated, because I’m working through these exercises and my liver purifies the blood and also regulates processes, emotions. So now that those channels are flowing properly, things just don’t bother me as much.
Abby (00:20:11) Opening up the heart space, supporting the spleen, which is tied to digestion. So I just have a lot more energy and I’ve been feeling called even do the exercises that Jeanette originally gave me that are longer, but they go deep and integrate those into my practice and just feeling just this deepening connection with my body, deepening, healing, this increasing energy and just this sense of gratitude for life and appreciation for this beautiful world that we’re in. And there are times when I remember feeling this way, too, when I did a lot of qigong when I was studying it in my earlier days.
Abby (00:20:58) Now that I’m getting back into doing a lot more as I feel a big shift, like a shake and I release, I feel a block release, the channel opens up and my eyes open and there’s this sense of vividness and crispness through the way I see through my eyes and this intense sense of presence and connection with my environment and my body. And it feels so different, so vivid, and crystal clear. And it’s like this moment of awakening that I’m experiencing through my body, through doing these exercises. And with that, it’s not even a place where any to write down.
Abby (00:21:40) I work through things in my head or, you know, process. It’s just breathing and moving and feeling and just stretching and just very much doing these exercises where a lot of the whole exercise could be sitting in one place and just doing some gentle arm movements and holding something for quite a while. But it’s moving our energy through my body and this very powerful, incredibly healing way. And I’ve always felt and in my experience, that healing is also awakening these to go hand in hand as we heal and release the blocks of what is untrue, what is painful, what you get on the other side of it is this deeper awareness and a deeper connection with what is true for you with what is free.
Abby (00:22:34) So as I’m releasing these blocks into my body, releasing these blocks from my body, my body is going through or I’m going through an awakening experience within my body. It’s a body awakening if you will. And it’s hard to imagine. It’s something that you need to experience as this sense of aliveness and vividness and clarity and lightness and beauty. And it’s just this connection with my body and with my environment that’s just so profoundly beautiful to experience. And so, yeah, it’s motivating, it’s encouraging. It’s something that my body begins to want to do. Before, when I was tired, it took extra energy to get up and do my dang exercises because I knew it would help.
Abby (00:23:30) I know it would be physical, I would shake a lot. I probably make lots of weird noises, but then I would feel much better for the rest of the day. Now I wake up and I crave it. My body tells me, Hey, I want you to go back and I want you to do that exercise that Jeanette told you showed you a while ago. So I go back and I do it. I feel amazing. I feel more things open up. I go for a walk with my dogs. I feel my alignment in my body is just. The way it’s supposed to be. And it’s just such an incredible thing.
Abby (00:24:04) And now it’s something that I’m kind of seeing as my part-time job while I’m healing the stuff that, you know, this quote-unquote chronic issues that have been here for years, I’m healing it inside of myself. And when things started to shift and it’s been giving me energy treatments for we started last fall. So it’s been a while, I think it was last September. And so she’s been giving me these treatments for some time. It was when I started doing the exercises myself, but she said, Hey, your energy feels way better, things are different.
Abby (00:24:42) And that’s when I noticed things feeling way better and different within my body, within my life. And it was something that shifted where I just decided, All right, I went on a diet. I know I can do hard things. I can just do my exercises even when I don’t feel like it. I can just get up each morning and do it. And if for some reason I miss a morning, I will get up and do it the next day. And it was like that switch was like, I just turned a light switch on where I decided to take an active role in my health and my healing. And instead of being frustrated with life and resentful that it wasn’t easier, that it was, you know, you know, my husband can eat whatever he wants and be fine, but I could sit there being all, you know, my pity party about that.
Abby (00:25:33) I could get up and do something about it. And that’s what I did. And that’s when everything started to change. And I’m so happy to have to be experiencing this, because it is this deeper level of integration, of taking responsibility for my health and my well-being. And with this, I’ve also been doing the emotional pieces of speaking to the issue, the pattern, and the reason for it of clearing entities. I’m a shaman. I do lots of entity clearing, so it’s a thing. It’s okay. Just entities attached to beliefs, you know, just darker energies.
Abby (00:26:13) So what the clearing of that along the way, which is also a dimension of this, but this part that I was missing was the personal practice and doing these really powerful qigong exercises that are targeted to exactly what I need, which, you know, for a lot of women who struggle with digestive issues and menstrual issues, it’s spleen and kidneys and with that liver. So I was doing these exercises. I still am. I probably will be for several more months. But I’m feeling so much better in my life and noticing so many differences in how I feel in my heart and how I, you know, just walk outside.
Abby (00:26:56) I just can’t help but appreciate how beautiful the sky and the trees are and the birds chirping because it’s springtime now and even when it’s cold as fuck is still beautiful in some way. So I’m just that’s where I’ve been. I’m just really grateful. I’m really happy. And I don’t want to say the word hopefully. I am hopeful, but I’m also just really confident that I can continue healing, that I’m moving in that direction. I need to be going in now. And with that, I wanted to mention Jeanette. So she is working in mind-body free now and we’re going to be bringing her in to do an episode soon so you can meet her there.
Abby (00:27:40) But she is going to be offering one on one sessions with people. You’ll be able to book it through the website. She offers amazing distance a.k.a remote energy healing treatments, so they’re focused on Chinese energetic medicine. Jeanette comes from a background of traditional Chinese family where they worked with herbs and diet for healing. And then she’s done so much learning and growth within the world of qigong and Chinese energetic medicine. So she offers this one-on-one session with people and she prescribes personalized exercises that you can do based on what you need.
Abby (00:28:24) And she’s also working in the mentorship program where she’s teaching some Qigong classes within the group there as well, and helping everybody to feel good and healthy in their body. Because a lot of us, you know, have been through stuff in this lifetime and past lifetimes. And part of healing the heart is also healing the body. Healing the body makes it easier to heal the heart, you know, all interconnected. So I’m really happy to be having Janette within the mentorship program as well. We’ve been getting so much great feedback. People have been having so many great questions for her.
Abby (00:29:02) So I am excited for you to all meet her in the next episode. And until then, I hope you are all doing beautifully. I hope that the story gave you some takeaways. I know for me the biggest takeaway from my journey was those few. One was just being open to receive help, to have the humility, to acknowledge that even though I’m skilled at this stuff, I need some help right now. And then being open to receiving that and, and then the shift in taking an active role in my well-being and doing the dang work and getting up each morning and doing the exercises that I know are so incredibly helpful for me.
Abby (00:29:50) So if you are on your journey of healing your body, I want you to know that you’re not alone, that you can heal anything. You’ve got this. You can do this. And if you want to support, you can reach out. You can schedule a free discovery call. I would be happy to support you myself or point you in the direction of someone who can help you heal. So sending you my love, you can reach me at mindbodyfree.com as well as Instagram and Facebook @yourmindbodyfree. And if you like this episode or you find this content useful, I’d love to receive a review from you on iTunes. And if you have any questions for future episodes, just drop them in the comments or send me a message. All right. Have a great day. And you, my love.,