Posted on Leave a comment

19-Come Home to Yourself

Come home to yourself abby light
purple podcast banner come home to yourself

Come Home To Yourself

In episode 19 – Come Home to Yourself, we unpack the symptoms and reasons for feeling disconnected from your true self, and what you can do to reconnect with who you really are. This episode is for anyone who struggles with feeling stuck, alone, anxious or depressed. Or for anyone who feels disconnected from their emotions, body or life.

Connect with Abigail:
Instagram @yourmindbodyfree
Facebook @yourmindbodyfree
Mentorship Program


 

Mind Body Free Podcast Love

Are you subscribed? If not, there’s a chance you could be missing out on some bonuses and extra show tools.  Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, or Spotify to be sure you’re in the loop.  

Do you love the show? If so, I’d love it if you left me a review on iTunes. This helps others find the show and get integrative healing support. Simply click here and select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review”. Thank you so much ❤︎

Looking for more support?
Schedule a free discovery call here
Learn more about my 6-month Mentorship Program here.

 


 

Full Show Transcript

Abby (00:00:00) Hello. Welcome to the Mind Body Free Podcast. I am your host, Abigail Moss. I’m so excited to have you here. I am a healer, a coach, and a mentor. I help people to heal their minds, their body, their spirits, remember their magic, their purpose, and share their gifts with the world. And today, I want to talk to you about the symptoms that so many of us are experiencing around the world, and have been experiencing for many generations, for many centuries, this concept of connection and disconnection.

Abby (00:00:45) And I feel when we get down to the root of things, the biggest core piece that I’ve found is a sense of disconnection that creates suffering, and that is a disconnection with our true selves, with who we are authentic, with our spirit, with our heart and soul, disconnection with our body, with the messages our body is giving us. When it’s telling us, Hey, I need you to slow down. I need you to let go of these thoughts. I need you to eat or drink differently, to live differently. Messages from Mother Nature.

Abby (00:01:22) The way we live on the planet. We don’t feel that connection with Mother Earth. We don’t realize that when we damage the Earth, we’re damaging ourselves, both spiritually and practically. The Earth is our mother. It is literally what makes up the elements of our bodies, and it is the one that sustains life, that keeps us alive, that nourishes us. And as we harm the Earth, if we put toxins in the Earth, those toxins end up right back to us. And spiritually, the earth is a part of who we are too. We are an extension and evolution of nature, and to harm the mother is to harm the self and each other.

Abby (00:02:06) If we feel disconnected from each other, if we feel isolated, if we feel alone, it is like the leaf that falls off of the tree. We don’t have the nourishment of the larger community, the larger organism that is the collective, and that connection with each other. It can lift us, it can inspire us. It is where we go to co-create and collaborate and feel loved and held and share our love. So connection and disconnection, it’s such a core piece of how we feel in life, how we experience life and ourselves.

Abby (00:02:49) And with that, there is the ego. So the egoic mind is a part of creating disconnection, as was part of creating separation, and that has a place that has its value in the physical world on the Earth plane, we need some degree of separation between self and other so that I know I am me and you are you when you are in pain doesn’t mean that I am in pain. And that’s good because it means I can take care of you and it’s a balance. So if there’s too much sense of separation, I can forget that I am also connected to you.

Abby (00:03:30) I am one leaf on the tree, but I’m also, by extension, the whole tree and connected to you as another leaf on that tree. So it’s finding the balance and it’s remembering that within all of these different perspectives and senses of separation, there’s also the greater wholeness of each of us, of life, of the universe. Alan Watts said You are a focal point in which the whole universe looks out. You can imagine that within each of you, as Rumi said, the universe dwells inside you. Within each of us, there is an infinite and infinite expanse of consciousness of possibility, because we are connected to all that is, and all that is is connected to us.

Abby (00:04:28) And the way that we lookout is a focal point of all of that. And our consciousness is a beautiful celebration of life because if we don’t have a sense of separation, it’s harder to experience individuality, to experience new things if you’re simply infinity forever. So we come into this world of duality, of light and dark, and all of the shades in between. And that gives us the breadth and depth of. Periods of life where we can have new experiences as individual consciousness, and in those experiences grow and evolve our consciousness.

Abby (00:05:11) Until many believe, I sense that we are eventually ready to return to a greater, infinite sense of oneness. We go through these cycles, the birth of the soul, this individual experience of learning, and then coming back home to oneness. And with that, there’s also the individual sense of separation from self. So if you think about each of us as a soul, as a spirit, we have our unique essence, our unique consciousness, the signature. That is who we are, our energy.

Abby (00:05:53) And we are that observing consciousness, the witness having this experience of life, making decisions, experiencing the results of those decisions as we go throughout our lifetimes and as we go throughout these lifetimes, as we go through simply one lifetime growing up as a baby and into adulthood, we are biologically programmed within instinct to fit in with the tribe so that we can stay alive because we not as much today.

Abby (00:06:30) Well, yeah, actually, we are still very much in many ways dependent on each other and civilization on society for keeping us alive in this big, wild world of earth where we support each other we’re meant to have different rules that we then share and complement with each other. And this societal structure, this part of us that is social, wants to fit in with the tribe. We are biologically programmed to fit in. When we come into this world, we see as babies, can I have a place where I belong? Because that is how I will survive.

Abby (00:07:08) Especially when we’re young. We’re helpless. Can I be loved? Can I belong? Is what we’re looking for. And so we can mold ourselves. We learn to mold ourselves into the ways that we think other people want us to be. And we do that as a form of survival so that we can stay amongst the tribe and be accepted. And so that can mean smiling when we don’t feel happy or saying we will want to do something or will do something when it doesn’t feel right in our bodies.

Abby (00:07:44) And that can evolve more and more into growing up and taking a job that we feel we should take, even though we don’t want it, or following a life path that doesn’t excite or inspire us at all, maybe even makes us feel less and less alive because we think that’s the path we’re quote-unquote, supposed to take. We take it. So it’s like a habit that develops from a very young, initially out of a need for survival. And then it just becomes this habit of doing what others want us to do instead of listening to what we want to do. And as babies and young children, we come into the world with very good boundaries usually.

Abby (00:08:25) So children are not typically shy about telling you how they feel, what they do want, what they don’t want, what they’re comfortable with, what they aren’t comfortable with. They can vocalize that quite loudly. But as we get older, we learn to calm that part of ourselves. We learn to appease others, and that’s not all bad. We do have a degree of compliance that all live and work together as a toddler. We don’t want to let them take the crayon and draw all over your friends or our friend’s wall or our wall, typically. So it’s a balance, right? But we learn as kids, we get this habit of doing what others want us to do, even when we don’t want to.

Abby (00:09:11) And over enough time, we can even forget what it is that we even wanted in the first place. And that part of us, that inner voice that says that points you in the direction of what feels good for you. It gets muffled out and it gets quiet down behind layers and layers of social conditioning to belong within the tribe. And that’s where we can fall into patterns of depression and anxiety. This feeling of dullness or emptiness in life, because we’re going through these motions and these motions that aren’t exciting or even really feel like us. So for me, I remember going through a period of my life where I felt like I was just living in this dream-like I was living somebody else’s life.

Abby (00:10:06) And I felt alienated from my own life and myself. And later on, I went down a healing journey through plant medicines and shamanic training, and much more. But it was a symptom of not being connected with and aligned with my authentic self. I’m not even knowing where or what that part of me was. I had been going through the motions for so long of doing what my egoic mind thought I wanted, what I identified with as successful and good. And this will make me happy.

Abby (00:10:45) And just trying to push through to make that work, even though it wasn’t what my heart really, truly wanted. And some of us can go through our whole life this way of not knowing the deeper part of ourselves inside and others. You know, we’ll get glimpses of that, those moments that feel so alive and free, where we’re touching our soul and even maybe expressing a part of ourselves. And that’s such a beautiful experience to taste that and to dip your toe into that. And for those of you who felt that you know what I’m talking about, those moments that are just so vivid, so present, so beautiful in that way.

Abby (00:11:32) And if you haven’t felt that, hey, that is okay, it is still available to you, that part of you is still inside. And a lot of people right now are feeling a calling, the sense of, I need to find something. I don’t know what that is, but I need to find it. And I felt that calling years ago when I was on my beginning, my path of healing and awakening. And I think those two things kind of go together like two sides of the same coin or two parts of an interdimensional door to your soul and the universe. But that calling is the biggest place that comes from is your soul.

Abby (00:12:17) It’s that part of you that is saying, Hey, find me. You need to find me. I’m here. I’m here. I’m waiting for you to come to find me so that we can dance in this magic of life. So that we can share these gifts. Unlock these gifts that are inside of you. This purpose that you have here in this pivotal time on earth is calling for us to awaken to who we truly are and to share our gifts with the world, those gifts that are so needed. I feel in a sense that calling is a part of this awakening, this birthing of consciousness, of a new era on earth, perhaps. And answering that calling can feel overwhelming.

Abby (00:13:07) It can feel like, where do I even begin? I know I need to do something, but what? What do I need to do? Where do I need to find this? There’s this overwhelming urge, but the details are not laid out. I don’t know where to begin looking, and that’s how I felt anyway. And if you’re there, then I feel you. I’ve been there. For me, it was overwhelming. It was all-consuming in many ways. And I just knew I needed to find this thing that seemed just beyond my reach, just beyond my grasp. Or I could almost pierce through the veil and grab it. But I just couldn’t quite bring it into clarity, into conscious awareness yet.

Abby (00:13:50) And so I spent seven years learning how to do that, learning a path back to myself through traveling different parts of the world, working with shamans, studying yoga philosophy and practices, learning shamanic healing, how to work with the mind and release unhealthy patterns and beliefs, and working with plant medicines that are expansive and consciousness and deeply healing for me anyway. And working with energy and learning qigong and Chinese shamanism and learning how to integrate all of these things, which are both tools for healing and awakening. So two sides of the interdimensional door as we heal the painful things. Which are things like past traumas.

Abby (00:14:47) Emotions get stuck in the body and cause the energy to stop flowing in the body. Which leads to pain, fatigue, illness, beliefs that are not in alignment with our true nature, with our true essence as we learn to release these things. And with that also external energies. So things like entities that can kind of run amok, kind of look at them as opportunistic energies that can kind of create chaos in people’s lives until you learn how to deal with them. So as we release things like this, we are healing. And as we release things like this, we are pulling off the layers between your awareness and your true self.

Abby (00:15:32) So you can imagine every untrue belief, like not feeling worthy, not feeling good enough or strong enough or good or lovable, or like you belong. Those are all different layers, different veils, covering up your true self. And as you pull off each layer, it’s healing. It is like pulling a thorn out of your side. That was creating anxiety, overwhelm, depression, and pain. As you pull that out, you naturally begin healing your body, your spirit, your mind. And as you do that, it is easier and easier to connect with that part of you that is infinite. That is why that is magical. That has all the answers to who you are and what you’re meant to be doing here in this lifetime.

Abby (00:16:22) So they happen at the same time, layer by layer, piece by piece, releasing that, which is untrue. And as we do that, this is the first step that I do with my mentor students and my mentorship program, which is beginning to heal what creates the most suffering, healing it from the nervous system, from the body, from the spirit, from the mind. And as we do that, we’re creating space inside of ourselves to feel at home in the body, to feel at ease and calm. That’s number one. So if we’re carrying around, I like to joke that it’s like a big boulder.

Abby (00:16:59) So if we’re carrying around grief and depression, I have this big boulder in my arms and whatever I do, I’m going to bring that with me. So let me go figure out my life purpose. I might just bring this boulder with me as I go. And it’s like, Oh, no, we can’t do that. It’s too exhausting and taxing and distracting to be carrying around all that pain. So the first thing we do is learn how to put the boulder down. And as you do that, there’s so much more space and freedom and energy inside of you. And from there we can connect with who you truly are.

Abby (00:17:34) And that is a process of remembering, of coming home to your heart and letting your heart guide you to give you messages and insight and wisdom. And the heart is a portal to the soul. And in this portal, you learn how to connect with your divine essence inside of you. And you learn how to let that guide you. And you learn how to connect with other parts of you to navigate this life on earth from your most wise, magical, infinite self. So we learn how to listen to the heart, how to speak with your future self who is already doing all of the things that you’re meant to be doing.

Abby (00:18:17) So you don’t have to figure out, How do I do it? What is my purpose? What does that look like? That’s not something that your conscious mind will have easy access to. So that can be stressful trying to figure that all out so we don’t do that. Instead, we go inward, we connect with your inner wisdom and we move forward in time and get a glimpse of what your future self is already doing. And we ask that part of you how you got there, what you’re doing, who you’re doing it with, all of those kinds of questions. And we bring that wisdom, that insight, that guidance back into your life today.

Abby (00:18:55) And from there, having tasted this future life that is available to you and getting clarity on how to get there, now you have this clear path before you where you know where you’re going and you know how you’re doing it. And then it’s just taking step by step, one foot in front of the other, moving towards this place that is clear and beautiful in front of you. And it is so much more fun to manifest from this place of insight and wisdom and magic and all of the things that we do can move us in that direction. And what an incredible thing to have your mind be a servant to your heart, to support you in creating the life you want to live, but already getting to see and touch and feel what that life is.

Abby (00:19:47) So you know, you’re moving in the right direction. This all comes from connecting with who you truly are, with letting go of the beliefs of who we think we should be, of who others want us to be, of what is acceptable to be letting go of all of that so that you can remember and discover who you truly are and what you are here to do in this world and this lifetime. And it’s a beautiful thing to awaken to. And as you awaken to that. Your life begins to change in ways that you couldn’t predict. Things start aligning as you realize what you want and who you are.

Abby (00:20:37) The world starts bringing that in front of your vision, in front of you and offering to you more and more of that so you can begin creating more and more of that in your life. And things shift in synchronistic, beautiful, magical, unpredictable ways. And it’s part of just being on your path. Part of being connected with who you truly are. I don’t want to say they get easier because there will always be challenges in life. But when you have the tools to release the triggers that come up for each of us, that’s just part of being alive on earth. We’ve all been through experiences this lifetime and other lifetimes, releasing the triggers.

Abby (00:21:24) You learn how to do that to create space and freedom inside of you. You learn how to heal your body through things like breath and movement and awareness and intention. Very gentle things that are surprisingly, very, very powerful for healing. As you learn how to listen to your inner wisdom, to access your inner magic and the gifts that are wanting to come through you and be expressed in the world. As you do that, it becomes a different way of experiencing life where, yes, there are challenges, but you get stronger and you have this inner guidance system to help you navigate them. And with that, it’s also not about doing it all alone.

Abby (00:22:13) If I mentioned we’re here to support each other and find your tribe and your community, your people who will support you. For who you are, who will welcome you, you know, where you’re not too much, where what you were. The magic is wanted, where the healing gifts are wanted for those who are ready to receive it, who are ready to talk about it and grow together. That’s a big part of it, too, is having that sense of community where you can come and practice being who you truly are and be celebrated for that and grow together with others who are like you in their way.

Abby (00:22:59) So for me, that was the culmination of seven years of experimenting and trying and failing and trying again and traveling and learning from all of these different, incredible, beautiful beings in different parts of the world, offering gifts in different ways. And with that, I decided my purpose here is to help others awaken to their magic, heal inside of them, and to share their gifts with the world. And so I created a roadmap where over six months we connect through a supportive, accepting, beautiful community of people where you are welcome exactly as you are. And we learn tools, the tools that I found to be the most powerful, direct, clear ways of finding freedom, of connecting with who you are, and sharing your gifts with the world.

Abby (00:23:59) So we learn these tools, this road map back home to yourself, to feeling at home inside of you, where you belong, to remembering who you are and what you came here to do, and to share that with the world. And that’s what I teach in my mentorship program, this six-month journey of coming home to yourself ultimately. If you are feeling that calling in your path at this time, know that you are not alone, that you do have incredible gifts to share. We all do it in our way. They are there inside of you. Everyone comes into the world with their own original medicine, with the gifts that they’ve come here to share.

Abby (00:24:46) And because you have them, you are worthy and you are good enough to share them and to access this part inside of you. And it’s just a matter of the will and some support and guidance to do that, to find your way home and to express who that being is and the way that feels most freeing and joyful to you. So if that’s something that calls to you, my next mentorship is starting in May, and it’s going to be a beautiful class. Each class just feels so magical and each group is so different and beautiful in its way. So it was taught by myself and one of my previous classmates when we were studying shamanic Chinese medicine. Her name is Jeanette Lee, and she teaches Qigong, a Chinese energetic medicine within the mentorship as well.

Abby (00:25:47) So she’s teaching people how to work with their energy field, how to awaken their energy field, how to heal their body through the use of energy work. It’s really beautiful to have her supporting people in the group as well. So if this is something that calls to you, even if you’re not sure, but a part of you feels like this could be a path for me, then I encourage you to reach out to schedule a free discovery, call with myself, and from there you can feel into what this is all about and check inside to see if this is right for you. So sending you, my love. If you have any questions, you can reach me at mindbodyfree.com.

Abby (00:26:37) You can find me on Instagram and Facebook at your mind, body free and wherever you are in your path, in your journey, I’m sending you so much love and I know that you can create you can do whatever it is you’re meant to be doing in this life. All right. Take care. Talk soon.

SHARE THIS POST

Posted on Leave a comment

Nick Loffree: Bioenergetic Health

Nick Loffree Mind Body Free Podcast
Nick Loffree Bioenergetic Health

Nick Lofree: Bioenergetic Health

In episode 17 of the Mind Body Free Podcast, Nick Loffree shares his journey of Bioenergetic Health and how he used meditation, diet, and Qigong to overcome schizophrenia and become the healer he is today.

This episode is for anyone struggling with mental health, looking for ways to heal their body or strengthen their own practice with the powerful yet gentle healing practice of Qigong. Nick has a ton of helpful Qigong videos on his Youtube channel, so go check them out!

Connect with Nick:
nickloffree.com
Instagram: @nickofqi
TikTok: @nickofqi
Youtube: Nick Loffree Bioenergetic Health
7 Day Brain Reset


 

Mind Body Free Podcast Love

Are you subscribed? If not, there’s a chance you could be missing out on some bonuses and extra show tools.  Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, or Spotify to be sure you’re in the loop.  

Do you love the show? If so, I’d love it if you left me a review on iTunes. This helps others find the show and get integrative healing support. Simply click here and select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review”. Thank you so much ❤︎

Looking for more support?
Schedule a free discovery call here
Learn more about my 6-month Mentorship Program here.


 

Full Show Transcript

Abby (00:00:00) Hello and welcome to the Mind Body Free podcast. I’m your host, Abigail Moss, and today I’m getting to speak with Nick Lafley. Nick helps people attain their ideal mental and physical well-being through a bioenergetic toolkit. His work began with himself when he underwent a spiritual initiation of schizophrenia and subsequent health issues created by medication. He now helps thousands of people through his online courses, videos, and instructor certificates to achieve the same level of seemingly impossible healing. I found Nick through YouTube and one of his qigong videos, which was fantastic, and he’s got a ton of videos on there, so I highly recommend checking out all the notes. The links are going to be in the show notes after the show. So Nick, welcome. Thank you for being here. Thanks for having me. Yeah. How are you?

Nick (00:00:52) Pretty good. It’s always funny. I never just copy-paste my bio. I like, always rewrite it every time somebody asks me for my bio, so I didn’t have to like surprises every time I had to read back to me. I’m like, Oh, what? I wrote about this site.

Abby (00:01:06) I like that. You’re honest about that. I did the same thing. I feel like it’s like this continuous evolution and how you feel that day and where you’re going and the direction you’re moving.

Nick (00:01:14) I was just assuming whatever ones I wrote in the past just were awful. So.

Abby (00:01:18) Exactly. So just delete all of those. I’ve never existed. So can you tell me a little bit about the work that you do? You mentioned you kind of help people through the bioenergetic toolkit. So what does bioenergetic mean?

Nick (00:01:34) You know, mostly just the way of making cheese sound palatable to Western Western minds, I guess. But it’s also partly a lot of my exploration recently over the last couple of years as being into. How there is a materialist science behind the energy of the body and its very sort of like super well known. So I dug for it for a long time before I found somebody who put forth a complete theory of bioenergy that had practical applications and seemed to be valid.

Nick (00:02:11) A lot of people, you know, people try to Westernize Xi and Chinese medicine and stuff like that a little, you know, they’ll be like, Oh, you know, quantum physics and, you know, quantum physics as these. Really, it’s almost esoteric. It’s so difficult to understand what people are trying and what scientists are trying to say with quantum physics that you can practically take anything they say and extrapolate it to be proof of whatever spiritual thing you’re talking about.

Nick (00:02:35) So I was dissatisfied with most of the westernized versions of theories of XI or things like that until I was just because I’ve been in the world of nutrition a long time and am kind of trying to figure out how to fix myself. I had a lot of physical health problems after my mental health problems because of the medications I took.

Nick (00:02:55) And so I went there, you know, every like dietary philosophy, as you know, did the keto. I did the raw vegan, I did the paleo, I did all of it, you know, every detox you can imagine. And eventually, I stumbled into this weird, weird world of a guy named Raymond Peat. And he’s a biologist. He’s like 85 years old now, so he’s been teaching about this stuff for a long time. But he, instead of coming into medicine from the, you know, a medical school or like a nutrition school, he came to it straight out of like just pure science, right? And so he’d been saying biophysics and biochemistry and everything.

Nick (00:03:32) And he was just very getting dissatisfied with the status quo that he was seeing in science and then was noticing medicine was doing a lot of weird stuff based on that. And so he built on the work of a few old scientists who are dead now, like Otto Warburg and on Sell You, Dr. Britta Barnes, who’d been, you know, all inadvertently working in their worlds, coming up with these theories of how energy and energy flow is what runs the body. And so Ray took these ideas and built them into something more practical, like, how would you eat if you wanted to follow this?

Nick (00:04:07) What supplements would you take if you believe this about the human body? And so instead of like what’s usually the way the human body is looked at is very like structural, mechanistic, mechanistic. And that’s typically the criticism that we have when we’re coming from the Chinese medicine land and we look at the Western medicine lens and it’s like, you guys just see everything is like a car.

Nick (00:04:26) You know, these little moving parts and particles and everything. And in, you know, in physics, they would say, like, you know, there’s we can look at the same particle like a photon and it can be a particle or a wave, depending on how you look at it, right? But most of medicine and biology are still on the kind of particle part of biology, I guess, and how we view the body. And so these guys are sort of getting more into the wave of how to view the body.

Nick (00:04:52) So instead of just structure its energy and structure and how these two inform each other, the energy maintains the structure. The structure produces the energy. And as I started learning from this guy’s method, I just kept realizing more and more like he’s just describing Chinese medicine, having never come across Chinese medicine as well. Maybe kind of give him a chance. Like he was saying a lot of weird things that I was like, the ZOE. This is true. Like, he thought serotonin was a stress chemical. It wasn’t a happiness chemical.

Nick (00:05:21) He thought it was like a bit of a conspiracy on the part of the pharmaceutical companies. They just needed a new thing to blame for depression so they could patent another drug for 20 years, you know? So they came in and around the same time, people, it was in the 60s. People were using LSD and psilocybin and stuff, and those block the serotonin receptors. And so he thinks that it was a kind of collaboration. The government wanted to make serotonin look good because LSD made serotonin look kind of bad enough. So. So they got the heir to the drug companies.

Nick (00:05:55) The antidepressants they were using at the time are a bit of a tangent, but the presence there isn’t at the time. We’re MAOI inhibitors, the same thing that you take when you take ayahuasca, the DMT drug. Mm-hmm. You have to take an MAOI and MAO inhibitor to have the DMT stay in your system. And that was the original antidepressants up until the 1960s, where they were taking that half of EOSIO basically as a pill to cure depression.

Nick (00:06:24) But in the 1960s, the patent ran out, and so they wouldn’t be making any money off it anymore because all the generic brands would take it over. So they needed a whole new theory of what causes depression so that they could sell a new drug, and they came out with this deficient serotonin theory anyway. So this guy, this guy thinks this is much better so serotonin can cause a lot of mental health problems. And I thought that was crazy and the only reason I gave any.

Nick (00:06:48) A chance is because his underlying theory was just Western Chinese medicine. And so his other theory was this just like what my teacher says and qigong when your stress lowers energy production. Like we tend to think in the West, like, Oh, stress is good for me. It makes me productive, right? I’d be so useless if I didn’t have my stress pushing me all the time. But eases your stress as a backup system.

Nick (00:07:11) You don’t want your stress being your main motivational sort of drive. That’s like your backup system. That’s why we wind up getting cancer and things like that. It’s not natural for the body to be having stress as a source of energy all the time. And so he thinks when the stress is low, you have higher energy and better quality energy. And when the energy’s high, you have lower stress. And he explains this all in terms of hormones and everything. But he’s essentially saying the same thing I’ve heard for years and years of qigong in Chinese medicine and everything.

Nick (00:07:40) So I gave him a chance with the serotonin thing and did a bunch of stuff, he said to lower my serotonin. And I got to say, like, it has a huge benefit on my mental health. I can track like, Oh, I stopped doing those Serotonin lowering things and now start to get a little depressed or to get a little more anxious than I usually am. And it’s just amazing how the mainstream can just be flipped on its head, and it can be the opposite for something we’ve been doing for 50 years.

Nick (00:08:04) And it can work. Wow. Did you have a question? I remember what your question was. Oh yeah. Why do I call myself bioenergetic? It’s because that’s the name for like, this school of thought is like the bioenergetic theory of health. And so I thought I would apply that to qigong and stuff.

Abby (00:08:20) It was a loaded question. That’s so interesting. And as someone who has done ayahuasca and still uses psilocybin, I find it helps my mental health quite a bit with ayahuasca. Definitely. I don’t know the chemical. I don’t have an experience of chemical serotonin exploration and lowering not to create happiness, but I want to. It’s kind of interesting how you mentioned, you know, we use more energy when we are stressed. I wonder if the serotonin release is a response to that stress and what you’re doing by lowering it is also affecting the cause of why your body feels the need to release it. I don’t know. I’m just exploring, but I think it’s fascinating.

Nick (00:09:02) Yeah. Here’s a really weird fact: you know where locusts come from. You know, the swarm is like a swarm of locusts, right, like in the Bible and stuff.

Abby (00:09:13) Yeah, yeah. Oh yeah.

Nick (00:09:14) His locusts are just grasshoppers. And it’s just when grasshoppers get super stressed because they don’t have food in their environment or things like that, then they transform into locusts instead of being serious instead of being peaceful, solitary grasshoppers. They swarm together. They form a mob and they go, go, and riot, and they physically transform. They get the gross spikes. They look more aggressive. They act more aggressively. They become cannon.

Abby (00:09:39) It’s like something that’s in an animal movie, but it’s real.

Nick (00:09:42) And the chemical that drives their transformation from grasshopper to locust is Serotonin.

Abby (00:09:47) That’s so interesting. I love that one species will transform like that. I get the term for it. But I know, like Candida, it’s a yeast that’s like, you know, harmless yeast and a balance. But then with stress and, you know, toxins and the wrong environment, it transforms itself into a fungus and then spreads throughout the body. So it’s so interesting that stress is always the factor, the contributing factor.

Abby (00:10:11) So, yeah, that’s so interesting, huh? Well, it makes sense that, you know, a plague of quote-unquote a plague of locusts if there are not great things happening in that time. Of all, these grasshoppers are getting stressed and starting a swarm every yeah

Nick (00:10:25) And eating at each other and stuff.

Abby (00:10:27) Yeah. Oh, God. Yeah, that sounds very fitting in the Bible story. Yeah. All right. So you went on quite this journey and you went on a big mental health journey. So it sounds like you integrate a lot of these lessons into yourself. Oh yeah. And seeing experientially what worked and what didn’t work? Yep.

Nick (00:10:46) It felt like an unknown. And what is that uncharted and trail or whatever? You know, as I was like, I’m like, I’m like seven, like seventeen. And I have psychosis and the doctors are just like, Oh, just take these pills. And I’m like, Is there anything else I should do? And they’re like, No, no, just the pill. Yeah. Like, I’m like, Have you heard of meditation? I just heard about the meditation things that I do out of there, like, worry about it, just take the pills.

Abby (00:11:11) And it’s sad. It’s such a loss for the ability to help people with this kind of thing. It’s interesting. Like in the shamanic perspective, mental illness and schizophrenia especially would be seen as a healer trying to be born where you’re accessing kind of these different dimensions and perceptions and states of being that are in like a really low frequency and you have this innate gift to perceive this stuff. But there’s a lot of healing that needs to happen to clear away that darkness and make it feel like a gift and not a burden.

Nick (00:11:43) Yeah, I was really lucky. I had read a book on shamanism like right before or right as if I was going into psychosis or something. So I kind of had that mental frame, like already kind of made for me, and I have a word for that. I think it would be a lot harder to get through because you think about it just as something you’re fighting instead of something you’re integrating or surrendering into like that. Yeah, yeah.

Abby (00:12:05) You’re not broken and you’re just going through an initiation. As you said, when you’re yeah,

Nick (00:12:09) I think that’s part of it. Yeah, when I was able to relax and because a big part of it was just constant paranoia. So it was like the hallucination part and delusion part. But then it’s just like it’s paranoid and full of fear all the time. And when I was able to let go of the paranoia and fear part, the hallucination delusion part would sort of instead of being like all this crazy stuff, my mind was trying to convince me that it became like holy visions as I would.

Nick (00:12:35) I knew nothing. I knew nothing about Hinduism, but for whatever reason, I was having visions of, like Hindu gods all the time. If I could relax like my chocolate open and these gods would come to visit me, they wouldn’t say anything. It’s just ignored. There’s like this visual art. Almost that was like reshaping my energy body or something like that. Amazing. I kind of miss it now because I know, I know that a little too much with the medication. Oh, and now I’m like, Oh, I wish I could just relax at night and hang out with gods and stuff.

00:13:05
Abby: Oh well, I can help you with that. We can talk about that, OK? I had a friend or not a friend. She’s a friend now, but I had a student I worked with for a year and she had schizophrenia, and she grew up as early as she can remember seeing demons all around her. And just like Tara, terrifying. And so we did a lot of healing on the trauma and like the layers of trauma as there is, there’s a lot to release and as we release it layer by layer, she started seeing angels and she started seeing the demons as these misguided energies and learning how to work with them and healing energies. Incredibly powerful healer.

Abby (00:13:39) It’s been amazing to watch her grow into herself and realize this, but I feel like I also have an uncle with schizophrenia, and it didn’t go that direction because he didn’t have anyone to support him in that journey. You have this intuition and this will move into this stuff, which is beautiful. I feel like if more people have the right support, we have a lot more healers in the world than like, you know, people who are still being tormented by this stuff.

Nick (00:14:04) Yeah, I agree. Yeah, this is funny. I think it’s a funny thing in the West. Swear. You know, our history in Europe is like the church and the scientists were like they hated each other, right? Because the church was like, we not only do we own spiritual truth, we are objective truth, right?

Abby (00:14:22) They want to do whatever.

Nick (00:14:23
Nick: They like to overstep their bounds with their like field of expertise. And so the people who are trying to discover objective truth in the physical world were totally at odds with them. And so we’ve developed a culture, you know, hundreds of years later, we’re still in this culture where, you know, if you’re a scientist, if you’re a psychiatrist or psychologist or whatever like, you’re expected to think a certain way, like demons aren’t real. Angels aren’t real. Psychic abilities aren’t real.

Nick (00:14:48) Like anybody who thinks these things have to be delusional, like, I’m sure some people are just like hallucinating, but probably a lot of people are hallucinating. But I think there’s a lot of this like in my experience with what I went through. I don’t know how much you know about my story, but I had real experiences of supernatural phenomena. And you tell the psychiatrist about that, and I wasn’t integrating it well. I was super paranoid.

Nick (00:15:09) So they go to a psychiatrist and there’s like, oh, supernatural phenomena, schizophrenic. Like, you’re just crazy. And it’s like, Yeah, I’m like trying to do experiments with them and everything like, let’s see if this is real. And they have no patience for that at all.

Abby (00:15:22) Yeah, because it’s not aligned with the belief system, right? It’s like it’s been against the popular ideology. And I’m popular. It was illegal to explore that stuff.

Nick (00:15:32) Is that what it was?

Abby (00:15:34) Well, I mean, back in like the pagan Christian colonialism, I mean, it was illegal to practice other forms of spirituality and kind of commune with spirits. Yeah. And then eventually became just going to be demonized in the media. And oh, it’s not real. It’s all false. And then there’s like you mentioned, that materialist perspective of this is what’s real, only what we can measure.

Nick (00:15:56) Yeah, they’re like the new church itself. It’s so funny. Yeah. So this always happens like a group that’s persecuted. And then finally they win the day and now they’re the most powerful group. And then there’s persecution, you know, it was just so ridiculous like that

Abby (00:16:10) We’ll find balance someday, I think. Yeah, perspective is good, and I like what you’re doing. your kind of bridging these two worlds of science and energy in Chinese medicine, which China is and I think can seem like it can appear as a kind of woo and like, what? What are you talking about? Like, I know when we were taught, they told us that, you know, Western medicine sees the body like a machine, which can be useful sometimes. Like, if I break my arm great, I will happily go see Western Doctor.

Abby (00:16:36) Chinese medicine sees the body like a garden. So we have to pluck the weeds. We have to balance the elements and the nutrients and plant good seeds. And it’s such a different, totally different paradigm, a way of seeing things and working through things

Nick (00:16:49) Uses a lot of metaphors and the west. I think the Western mind is so literal when you hear the metaphor like, oh, dampness or, you know, damp heat or things like that. And we’re talking about blood in Chinese medicine, we don’t always mean blood, you know, it’s like this kind of blood, you know, like spiritual blood. Go to that man. So in the western mind is that they think they’re like, really hearing like, oh, there’s dampness. Like, there’s like a build-up of fluid somewhere.

Nick (00:17:12) Well, sometimes we mean that, but sometimes it’s like, this thing is like, it’s like, it’s like the Chinese are separate, like metaphor and literal like literal reality and a lot of the ways they talk really. Chinese medicine Typekit. So it was very confusing to the Western mind. So we just classify it as we were, you know?

Abby (00:17:30) Yeah. I think it’s more like that soft kind of flowing abstract concept, a way of seeing things which I love personally. But I can see it also being infuriating if you’re used to being able to, like, clearly define things. So if you were struggling with these mental health issues when you were 17, which is early on, I mean, not uncommon as a teenager, but that’s tough. What was it like moving through that?

Nick (00:17:58) Is Just kind of terrifying all the time. For the most part. And then and then really amazing at some points like, as I mentioned, it’s kind of spiritual, energetic experiences. But for the most part, yeah, just mostly just sucked all the time. And then and then the medication sucked almost as bad as it did suck as bad. So it was worth taking. I guess it felt worth taking at the time, but it’s just like the opposite problem with you. I went from, like, in a psychotic state. It was like I was like, everything was so open energetically. It was like, as all boundaries.

Nick (00:18:31) I dissolved, and that just was terrifying. And then the pills are like the opposite. I got numb and I got fat and I got just full of mucus and skin inflammation and pimples. And just like the total opposite problem. Instead of being super anxious and fearful all the time, it’s like, I’m depressed and brain fog all the time. So, yeah, mostly it was just super lame, but gradually over the years, like learning different things, getting into meditation and yoga and nutrition and qigong. And I wouldn’t have put so much effort into those things and gotten as much out of them if I hadn’t been in so much pain.

Nick (00:19:09) So the first tool I tried to implement was meditation. A friend of mine had gotten me a book on Buddhist meditation while I was in the mental hospital. So I read that in the hospital and then when I got out, I practiced every day and it was kind of like it wasn’t an instructional book. It is a fictional story, I believe the Buddha said of his actual story of attaining enlightenment. I think it was like a fictional version that was meant to read like a novel. But in this version, he gains enlightenment by sitting next to a river and just listening to the sound of the river.

Nick (00:19:40) And that was like the thing he focused on was just that sound. And that was like a meditation technique. And so I was like, Well, that’s the only way to meditate. So I’ll do that. So I went to this river near my parent’s house like every day for literally three or four hours every day. And like me now, never do that way too uncomfortable. I’ll do that for like a week. I’ll do that for a retreat. But I do this for like six months straight and I’ll sit on these like uncomfortable rocks in a very uncomfortable body. I hadn’t done yoga or anything yet, so my body doesn’t like sitting like that and stuff.

Nick (00:20:12) And I’ll just force my mind like over and over and onto the sound of the river. And I got nothing out of it, nothing out of it. For six months, I didn’t feel more relaxed. And if it were peaceful or spiritual, nothing until like finally, what like on the six months or whatever, I’m sitting there and I put my mind on the river and it finally actually stays. It doesn’t wander off. It doesn’t go and listen to whatever voices are in my head. If you think meditating is tiring with just your voice in your head, you just try it with a whole bunch of voices in your head. But I finally got my mind to stay on this river, and I don’t even think it was that long. It was like 30 seconds, maybe a minute top where my mind was just dead silent, just hearing the river.

Nick (00:20:51) And I think about it is, I guess, my conscious mind because my conscious mind was so empty of thought at that moment. My unconscious was able to come out. And so all like the inner conflict I had, I was sort of driving the psychosis, the fearful part of the psychosis, basically just everything I hated about myself. I have low self-esteem, social anxiety, and stuff growing up. So it’s just like everything in me that I hated came out as one archetype like a mask of a demon, just like displaying and like vivid, horrifying detail like this is everything you hate about yourself.

Nick (00:21:26) But instead of seeing it as a mask of someone else, it was just like, This is you. And believing it for a split second and that fear like, oh no. And then the mask comes off and I’m looking at it as what it was. It was just a mask. And underneath that, seeing who I am, someone a kid worthy of love and worthy blah blah blah. And then I just basically cried for like 20 minutes of just snot pouring out of me into this river. And I’d like to say, Oh, after that moment, like I was healed of the psychosis was God.

Nick (00:22:00) Not at all. It was just like, it was like, you know, one percent of the burden is lifted and just a little glimpse into like, Oh, I because I had a feeling when I was going through it that a lot of this psychosis was driven by my insecurity. At times, I got bullied by things like that. And then I had this like unconscious trauma in me, and that the psychosis wasn’t just random because all my friends were doing all the same drugs and all the crap I was doing and they were psychotic.

Nick (00:22:25) So I figure there’s probably something in me that needs to come out in that kind of verify form for me want to had that experience, but I suppose my point to your question was I would probably not have pushed myself that hard for that long to get that if I wasn’t in such an immense amount of pain with no other options. So for that and that way, I’m grateful for it.

Abby (00:22:45) 100%. I mean, that’s what I think of so many people’s stories that start with pain and that’s a motivator, because why else would we bother to do the work? It’s work. You want it. I’m impressed that you did that for six months, not feel like you were getting anywhere but kept going back. That takes a lot of faith. Yeah, I don’t know why I do.

Nick (00:23:02) I think I just really trust the Buddhists because before, before I went psychotic, I’d been using psychedelic drugs and having amazing experiences on them and experiencing, you know, like the non-self and all the things that the Buddhists preach about enlightenment and then going without having read their text.

Nick (00:23:22) I experienced that first and then went and kind of got into Buddhism when I was reading their stuff and I’m like, Oh, well, this is exactly like what I experienced, so these guys must be on to something. And so I think because of that sort of thing, I had a lot of trust in what they had to say about how the mind works and stuff.

Abby (00:23:36) So a good friend, give me that book. Maybe he’s down. You get what you need when you need it when you’re ready for it, I guess. Yeah. Wow. OK. And so after that, how did you start getting into this by your energetic healing and qigong in Chinese medicine? Yeah.

Nick (00:23:52) So again, very similar. So I had been doing these psychedelic drugs, and I was experiencing like the chakras or the energy centers or the Dentons, basically exactly as they were laid out in those eastern classics I was experiencing on psychedelics before I was psychotic. And then while I was psychotic when I was just kind of permanently, it was like a lot of psychedelics. And when I relax, I would have these chakras and things open.

Nick (00:24:20) And so I was experiencing those oftentimes before I’d read anything about them and they went all the way up to like 22. Was like five years later, I was still having these experiences. I would come out of meditation or things like that, and then I’d go read a book and be like, Oh my gosh, this is exactly what they said. What happened? So it was sort of happening to me, and that’s what got me interested in the chakras. And then I was reading about yoga, and then my mom was getting into yoga and she’s like, You just come to a yoga class.

Nick (00:24:44) I thought I would get it. And I went to a yoga class and fell in love with it because that was the first physical thing. I’d been introduced to it before. That hadn’t occurred to me whatsoever that anything physical would affect my mind. Not diet, not movement, not sweating, not anything. I just thought, Oh, the mind fixes the mind, so I’m going to meditate like that. The mind thing and I have a mental problem. But when I did my first yoga class, I was like, Oh my gosh, this is the first time I’ve been relaxed and like, two years, where do I get more or less?

Nick (00:25:10) So I got, like, instantly addicted to yoga, like real physicals, like power, yoga, like, you know, use your muscles to move, your body goes up and you know, you can feel how doing the practice opens up the body’s energy. And so I just kept that curiosity going. And it gosh, it was like four years of this, four years of like meditation and yoga before I realized, Oh, I wonder what I’m eating has any effect on my brain or anything like that? I don’t put it together at all. I was eating fast food three meals a day for four years while being a practicing Buddhist meditator and like a serious yoga practice.

Abby (00:25:46) Kudos to you. Feel that a lot of focus on the mind of being through that.

Nick (00:25:52) Utterly Mcdonald and KFC and everything every day. And I think it was like, literally, I like reconnecting with an old friend and he’s like, Have you heard of this acid-alkaline thing? And I was like, What does that mean? And I started reading, I was like, Oh my gosh. Like, I never even connected the dots at all that like my skin problems like eczema, like mental health problems. All this stuff can have anything to do with what I was eating. Looking back, it’s like, I have no idea how that was not even on my radar at all. Isn’t that weird to not connect that at all?

Abby (00:26:22) Maybe you’re just like one at a time, you know, just like really chose the path of like, I’m going to figure this out one at a time.

Nick (00:26:29) I just didn’t even occur to. Meaning that it can be possible, and I still get surprised to this day. I like I’ll post on TikTok. Something about our diet can affect depression or this or that. I constantly get somebody in my comments who is so mad at me that I would suggest such a thing. They think I’m like, just some kind of quack, like trying to lead people off their medications, or I never tell people to quit their medicine.

Nick (00:26:52) I think I just give suggestions for other stuff they could do alongside it. People are constantly like, you’re going to trick people into thinking, if they kill, they’re going to be able to go off their meds. And then my words here is that

Abby (00:27:04) There are a lot of triggers in the world, like if someone’s in pain and it can be easy to want to point fingers. There’s a really good audiobook I listen to. You have to remember the name of it, but a psychiatrist and a chef, and she’s it’s all about the gut-brain connection. Is it

Nick (00:27:19)  Kelly Brogan?

Abby (00:27:20) Kelly Brophy? Indians are probably not, but I mean, that’s good. There are many books on this topic because they should be so huge. Yeah. You know, she talks to you about how you can’t. If you have had a mental condition for a long time, likely, there’s also something going on in the gut, and you can’t treat one without treating the other like you need to look at them holistically. And I’ve noticed that on my health journey, like if I eat the wrong thing, my body is very responsive. It gives me a lot of feedback. Within minutes, I know with my mood, if I if it was right or not, I have the same

Nick (00:27:52) Blessing and a curs

Abby (00:27:53) Sensitive. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It’s like you just you. There’s not a lot of wiggle room to keep messing up, if you know better to keep listening to that motivating force, right? With the psychedelics being a part of your journey, it’s found that like personally, when I did ayahuasca, it was incredible and transformative. And then coming back and trying to integrate that was just a shit storm, and it was a matter of like, OK, what are all the tools? What did everyone do before? Like the yoga qigong, the meditation? It’s kind of like standing back on your power, learning how to get back to the place you met, which plants showed you by being able to do it on your own?

Nick (00:28:33) I think a lot of people get lost where they just keep going back to the plants back, back, back, back and they never, they built, get some discipline in their life to kind of integrate and implement the stuff they learned and all get a lot of lost souls.

Abby (00:28:46) It’s true. Yeah, you know, it can be really powerful with the right additional support and the will and knowing that we’re not powerless to start doing this stuff. You can feel like you’re at a loss when you just look at what Western medicine says. And you know, a food diet has nothing to do with mental health like it can feel disheartening. Like, like, there’s no hope for you until you start trying things and believing that it’s possible to heal, which you seem to have no problem doing. So how did you get into doing that qigong?

Nick (00:29:20) She gave us a funny story. I was cleaning toilets at a gym for a job, and there there’s an inspiring moment. You know the chop-chop wood carries water, I guess. But I was like, I was halfway through my yoga teacher training. It was like a split up over a year, and I’m just trying to make money while I’m going through it. And there’s an acupuncturist slash bongos on the teacher, so like a Chinese martial artist who was at the gym operating out of there. And he’s like, Oh, if you love yoga, like, I bet you’re going to love qigong. And he sent me a YouTube video of this guy named Li. Hold on to him from the qigong world.

Abby (00:29:58) I don’t know, I’m OK.

Nick (00:29:59) I was going to say he’s the most famous name in Chicago, but maybe not. Yeah, he got famous because this DVD has gone on to PBS television for it. So it’s not anymore because it’s exercise stuff isn’t a thing anymore, but it was on PBS and all over the country for a while. But anyway, it seems like a little seven-minute qigong routine of just like, really gentle, like flowing slow-motion exercises that you link with your breath also very slow.

Nick (00:30:26) And I tried it, and I just couldn’t believe like how like just seven minutes of that made me feel so, so relaxed, like I’ve been doing a long time of yoga and meditation and things like that, and I’m like, Wow, that is the quickest path I have ever taken to being super relaxed and no anxiety. And I went to bed after that and my whole body just felt like it was made of cotton. And, at the time, I had this giant walk on the bottom of my foot. It was enormous, super deep. And I had it for like four years, and I went to the doctors over and over again to cut it off, like frozen off.

Nick (00:30:59) They burned it off, medicated it, and just kept coming back. And as I’m lying there in bed, I’m like, I wonder if I can make this work. Go away with this cottony energy I’m feeling. I just kept sending my breath and my attention. And eventually, this energy starts going to my foot or those waters, and my foot just starts kind of buzzing with that energy. And I kind of fall asleep while I’m doing this. But when I wake up, this word is not only gone, it’s so gone. It looked like it was never there, like the skin on the bottom, I flipped over. I like completely regrown and I never came back and

Abby (00:31:30) That’s miraculous.

Nick (00:31:32) But I later learned from Dr. Andrew Weil, who’s that, you know, have these kinds of famous for? He’s a real M.D., but he kind of makes his fame off of talking about, you know, holistic stuff and Mind-Body Medicine. He said that the number one illness that tends to respond best to mind medicine, like healing something with your awareness or a placebo or attention or visualization is warts. I have no idea why, but it says that’s like the most responsive illness that now

Abby (00:32:00) So physical. I know. Yeah, that’s great evidence. Aside from feeling fantastic, here’s some materialist evidence you change something on your body overnight.

Nick (00:32:11) So I was hooked just because it felt so good. And also, I’ve always been like a big, nature guy. So I love that, you know, all the movements are like a bear swims in the ocean and like the creams spreads its feathers, stuff like that. So I thought it was cool. So I got into it and I was just finishing up my yoga teacher training. So when I went back, I had to teach an exam, like teaching a little class to the classes, like part of graduating. And so I brought in some of those qigong moves into it and everybody loved it.

Nick (00:32:40) And so I was like, Oh, this is cool. And then when I got back from the yoga teacher training, I’d overstretched a whole bunch of my connective tissues. So like while I was going through the second half of this training, like every forward fold I did felt like someone was just sighing off my hamstrings and

Abby (00:32:57) I’ve been there. Yeah. So it’s hard at the training center.

Nick (00:33:00) It’s a lot of yoga to do all at once. It’s like you’re doing four hours of intense yoga.

Abby (00:33:05) That’s too much for the body.

Nick (00:33:07) It’s too much to kind of pack it all in like that, I think. But also, you know, I a good teacher and he’s like, like the main thing he was trying to teach this whole time was like, you know, listen to your body, listen to the instructions, listen to your body, like, take a break if you need to get to listen to all because I’m like twenty-two and I’m like the only guy in a room full of like twenty-five beautiful women. And I’m like, I don’t want to be the guy sitting out like I was. I’m trying to show off.

Nick (00:33:32) I just kept pushing through it, even though I felt like I was just getting ligaments sawed off. And by the time I finished the training, I’m like, Man, it hurts every time I do yoga. So I go to physical therapy and the physical therapist is like, Move me around. Like, Does this hurt? Am I hurt? I’m like, No, he’s like, You don’t have any pain. I’m like, Well, I just have pain when I do yoga. So can you fix that? And he’s like, Oh, how about you just don’t do yoga for a while? And I was like, I just could. I just literally dropped out of college and spent the tuition money, my last tuition money for college on a yoga teacher training.

Nick (00:34:01) Like, I invested everything in this thing and now I couldn’t even do yoga, let alone teach it. And I had some classes lined up to teach. And so instead of bailing on them, I was like, Well, for whatever reason, I can’t do yoga, but I can do qigong. Even the stretching parts of qigong I could do without the pain because it’s just like this different style of stretching that involves fluid movement while you’re stretching and stuff for a reason that didn’t aggravate things. So I just started teaching. I called a Chinese yoga class, and that way I could sort out those classes if people aren’t too disciplined.

Abby (00:34:32) Yeah, it’s amazing how much can happen with such a gentle approach. Something I love about qigong is that it is so gentle like all ages, all abilities. You can do it sitting down. You can do it lying down. Do it in your mind. Yeah, it all helps make me think of a situation where, you know, even though yoga is good for you, you do push it to a point and create stress. It starts becoming bad for you. But I’ve never found that with qigong, where it’s gotten to a point where it creates stress as I’m moving through a block and then I feel amazing a few minutes later.

Nick (00:35:04) But yeah, the only bad side effect. I’ve got another qigong or a couple sometimes that can aggravate the knees. A few misaligned things. It’s actually like 10 tennis elbow or a golfer’s elbow. You get qigong and tai chi me. That’s usually from just kind of standing the wrong way and stuff. And the other one is more energetic. We’re like. Comes from using too much mental effort while you’re doing qigong, so a lot of people get obsessed with it, visualizing part of it.

Nick (00:35:32) It’s like there are all these cool generalizations. Imagine this like going here that like going there and oh, you’re in a mountain and now there are birds. And so they get hooked on this idea that like, I’m going to control the tree with my mind, you know? Mm hmMm-hmm, what they don’t realize is, what they often do is like, let’s say you’re trying to move the chair to your lower abdomen. Well, if all the effort is coming from your head, from your mind, trying to direct the cheek that she’s going to go to your head to give energy to that mental effort.

Nick (00:36:02) And so I would add this period for like a year. I couldn’t figure out what was going on. I’d be doing qigong. I thought it was doing everything right. But at the end of practice, I’d have all this pressure in my head and give me brain fog, and I’d wind up getting really angry and easily irritable, and I couldn’t sleep. And I was like, What’s going on? What happened to qigong practice? Eventually, I learned that trying to force things too much mentally?

Abby (00:36:25) Do you find it because you teach qigong? Do you find that happens a lot with your students? Is that a common thing as Western people make thinkers?

Nick (00:36:33) It happens a lot in the qigong world, but not really with my students because I discourage it.

Abby (00:36:39) That’s good. So how did you go from that to what you’re doing now? Like, how did you feel called to start sharing this with people?

Nick (00:36:48) I just kind of know it all. I think I learn new things. I just want to tell everybody so I can either tell all my friends and family and annoy them and knock it. I’m not getting paid and they’re just being annoyed all the time because they want to listen to me. Or I could find people who want to hear what I have to say, and they want to give me money. And that’s everybody’s happy. So.

Abby (00:37:07) So fulfilling. Hey, I’ve been there also,

Nick (00:37:10) You know, desire to help the world, blah blah blah. I have to.

Abby (00:37:14) Yeah, it all kind of goes together, right? Whatever motivation. And did you ever find that like, I mean, for you? It doesn’t. I mean, for me, anyway, I found, as I’ve been on this kind of shamanic healing path and with qigong, there’s like this little part of the back of my mind that’s like, you can’t remember, like for you. You did. But like for me, if I had a word on my toe, my mom would be like, You need to go get some sort of hard chemicals to put on that thing because energy is not going to move that look. Look how dense and physical that matter is. Do you find that that’s something that you ever had to overcome? Or do you find that in your students of moving through that sense of doubt, they can come up?

Nick (00:37:54). Students, I think I’ve got a weird personality trait where when somebody, when somebody says something is impossible, it makes me like, just want to do it more.

Abby (00:38:05) So that’s a good trait.

Nick (00:38:08) So I feel like that’s helped me a lot. But I do. I ran into it not a ton with students. I have all kinds of students so actually there’s always something they believe to an extent, you know, and then it’s like, Oh, well, you can’t do anything about that with nutrition, you know, it’s like. Oh, now that I have cancer, I’m going to stop coming to chew gum in class because I need to go to chemo all the time and it’s like, Well, why don’t you do both? I say, Well, cancer’s too serious for qigong, so there’s not that kind of stuff that happens with COVID.

Nick (00:38:42) It happened a lot, you know, just people just don’t want to hear. And even people who have been doing qigong for ages, really want to hear like that. It’s like qigong could be helpful or there are dietary things that could be helpful because they’re in my class for maybe an hour or a couple of times a week. But then they’re watching the news like, you know, six hours a week. And so it’s just you’re kind of competing, you’re competing with a lot. You know, everything I teach, I always try to be like, you know, like, I don’t want to take full responsibility for you dying of cancer or something.

Nick (00:39:12) I’m not going to tell you to stop doing chemo or something like I’m going to pretend I know everything about, like how chemo works or how effective it is. But I know that like, other stuff also helps. And so when it comes to mental health, especially like I always try to be like, like, I’m not going to be the one to tell you to stop taking your meds, work with your doctor. If you feel like, you know, doing qigong or fixing your diet or something has given you a little more foundation where you feel a little more stable and you want to think of talk about weaning off your meds, like go to your doctor and talk to them about weaning off the meds.

Nick (00:39:44) Tell them you feel more stable. You don’t have to tell them why, because you tell them it’s qigong. They’re going to think it’s a bunch of B.S. and they all do whatever you’re selling them, you’re so much more stable. You want to experiment, you want to work with them more than they’re usually like, happy to help you out with that. But I never want to be the guy to tell people, don’t do this or don’t do that. But people, people do have a lot of limitations where they like, Oh, like, what does food have to do with your brain?

Nick (00:40:07) Your brain’s obviously in a capsule, outside your body, on another planet, somewhere in everything you eat. It’s not like it goes into your bloodstream and affects your brain and builds your brain and builds all the chemicals in your brain.

Abby (00:40:20) Not at all like that? No.

Nick (00:40:21) So I was always kind of funny running into people’s closed minds about that.

Abby (00:40:25) So I think it’s I mean, it sounds like you’ve got a grounded approach where you understand a lot of the scientists who have this sort of a blend of sounds like western and eastern medicine. So you can kind of speak to it. What’s actually from that material’s perspective, but also speak to that deeper, energetic layer, what needs to happen? I feel like if you can say, OK, here’s what’s happening to your brain right now and explain it in a way that is very relatable to what we’re used to hearing from scientists and doctors but also can add the other dimension.

Abby (00:40:56) I feel like that can open up worlds for people. For me, I’m very much like, I’m too abstract like I feel and experience that way. I’m not an encyclopedia of facts, so if people want that, I’m just like, You got to go see somebody else help you with that. But it’s really helpful for kind of opening up minds to the possibility of this being something that does things.

Nick (00:41:18) Yeah. Have you heard of them? There’s a French woman, a shaman named Karrine, something like a Mongolian. She trained in Mongolian shamanism.

Abby (00:41:28) I need to look into more people, and I’ve not heard of most people. But tell me about her.

Nick (00:41:34) Oh, this is well known. But yeah, she was a Frenchwoman. I think she was. I had heard what she was studying. She was an anthropologist or something, and she went to do her Ph.D. by living with the shamans in Mongolia and studying them. And as soon as she got there, as soon as she went to her first ceremony and as soon as the shaman started hitting the drum, she fell onto the floor, having seizures, and went into a shamanic trance. So the shamans were like, You’re not here to study here to become a shaman, just say no.

Nick (00:42:03) And so they trained her for like eight years or something. And when she came back, she had all this scientific training. And so she wanted to kind of bridge the gap. And she wound up taking a bunch of shamans from Mongolia and a bunch of schizophrenics from France and putting them in MRI machines to scan their brains while they’re in a shamanic trance or having a psychotic break. And when she showed these scans to neuroscientists, they couldn’t tell the difference between the brain of a schizophrenic patient and the brain of a shaman in a trance.

Abby (00:42:35) I think that’s amazing, but it also doesn’t surprise me.

Nick (00:42:38) It doesn’t surprise me at all.

Abby (00:42:39)
Abby: That’s so fascinating. What’s this woman’s name?

Nick (00:42:41) So I know her first name is Corrine C.O.R., and if you take like Corrine, Mongolian French shaman,

Abby (00:42:49) Or yeah, I’ll see if I can find her. That’s so fascinating. And any kind of lines up to it like that shamanic view of mental illness, being a healer, trying to be born like if your mind open and you have this ability to sense what’s going on around you, it’s like, OK, let’s just clear the lens through which you’re seeing it. Is it through pain, trauma and darkness, and attachments to that or fear? Or is it through the light that you are and the light around you and you know, the experiences of those past stories?

Nick (00:43:21) I think Joseph Campbell,

Abby (00:43:23) Have you heard of just, Oh yeah, yeah, that is one of her. We’ve followed this account.

Nick (00:43:29) You probably know what it is, the schizophrenic or maybe the psychotic? I remember what he says, but the psychotic or schizophrenic drowns in the same water that the shaman or the mystic?

Abby (00:43:40) I have. I have read that that’s a beautiful quote and encapsulates what we’ve been talking about. So well, I think. So if there are people out there who are struggling with their mental health, what would you want them to know?

Nick (00:43:53) It’s going to be hard. It’s going to take a long time. It’s going to take you people listening less time than it took me, excuse me. It was like 10 years before I really felt like I’m going to have, like pretty much overcome the stuff I can live a normal life quotation marks. But it’s going to take you guys less time because you found people like us here. It’s kind of like going through a lot of this and helping a lot of people. I spent a long time there. I was just reading books, lots of DVDs.

Nick (00:44:22) I never really talked to anybody who knew what they’re talking about for the first, probably like six years of going through this, I was just doing it all on my own. The people I like. You were like psychiatrists, so make use of it if you can get like. If you can talk one on one with somebody, you should really because it can, it’s just really going to take you a lot further, a lot quicker than trying to do it on your own, especially when you’re suffering from mental health problems. What’s wrong is that your mind isn’t working optimally, so trying to figure everything out on your own can take even longer because, you know, it’s a little harder to use your intuition and use your own guidance.

Nick (00:45:04) And it’s just nice to just have a team of support and people that can help you out on maybe on both sides of the East-West divide. And yes, that’s going to level up quickly. It’s not something that I can tell you to do. The action was like, Oh, eat this diet or do this, you’re going to find what works for you like. So just one thing I’ll say is that a big thing that’s in like the Daoist like Chinese medicine world, like a perspective on healing, like one lens that they’ll sometimes look through is if there’s something wrong with your mind, focus on healing your body and if something wrong with your body, focus on healing your mind and spirit. And it doesn’t always have to look like that, but sometimes that’s just a little easier.

Nick (00:45:51) Way to go about it is, you know, your mind’s having all this trouble. So really leaning on your mind’s abilities for your healing can sometimes be not as reliable, right? Going to your body, doing yoga and eating better and taking herbs and things like that can sometimes be a little. You can get a lot more of a foothold there. And then once you have that little more foundation of your body supporting your mind, bring in more mental stuff, spiritual stuff, things like that can be very useful and beautiful.

Abby (00:46:19) I like that perspective, too, like, OK, my mind’s not working great, but I’ve still got this body. How can I use that to help this part? That’s not running? Often we’ll jump in. All right, I’m going to jump into the painful part and navigate stuff within that spine. And especially to try and do it by yourself. Yeah, that is hard. Yeah, I’m a huge believer in having a team of support. It’s helped me so much in my life and I will probably work with other healers, guides and coaches for the rest of my life as well as you, the Chinese medicine, doctors of the body and, the Western medicine doctors for, you know, a handful of things. But yeah, yeah,

Nick (00:46:55) Having a lot of spiritual healing just comes from the feeling of being supported by family, even despite the advice they gave you. Yeah. For me, getting like my qigong teacher became like my number one mentor throughout. Still, to this point in my life is like my number one mentor, and I was like that filled in a huge, like healing gap in me. I had a very cold, distant father who, you know, I didn’t ever experience like, like warm, loving, supportive energy from a man. And when I got that from my qigong teacher, it filled a hole in my heart. And that was I felt like a big part of my healing process besides him just teaching me cool stuff.

Abby (00:47:32) Yeah, that’s beautiful. So much of that is just getting that nourishment that we need, you know, coming into the world with love, acceptance, belonging, community. Yeah. Yeah. It doesn’t have to come from your parents or political climate.

Nick (00:47:48)  Yeah. Yeah, there are studies on that. A lot of people will talk about how, you know, having homes without fathers present can be bad, especially for young boys growing up. But if you were kind of looking into the data, it’s actual communities without fathers. So it doesn’t matter that much if your home specifically has a father. But if the community does not like nurturing, supportive, protective, caring men who will just play the father role regardless of their biological status with you or whatever, that has the same positive effects.

Abby (00:48:19) That’s so interesting and so good to know. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, amazing. Such social creatures. Are. Yeah. So for people wanting to work with you, how would they go about doing that? What kind of stuff do you do with people?

Nick (00:48:34)  Yeah. So the easiest way to jump in with me is just to go to YouTube. I got tons of qigong routines, and a lot of them are like themes towards something you might be going through. So like, you know, checking for anxiety, to account for depression, to for neck pain, low back pain, all kinds of stuff like that. So that’s the easiest way to jump in and see if you know my kind of style of movement and breath and everything. Therapy is helpful for you. And then if you want to work with me one on one, if you go to my website, there’s a coaching tab or something like that there. So you can go one on one there.

Nick (00:49:09) And then, yeah, that yeah, I post lots of advice and stuff on TikTok and Instagram and things like that. Just follow me there and see what kind of stuff I like. Oh, I forgot. That’s the relevant thing and everything. We just. I just took an E-course called the seven-day reset. And it’s kind of putting together a lot of the tools. I just talked about some nutrition stuff and qigong, and it’s just kind of all it’s meant to be done is like a seven-day thing. You just try it for a week and just see if you feel better.

Nick (00:49:37) Does this particular diet philosophy that I’m advocating in this particular movement and breath philosophy I’m advocating work for your particular system. I’m sure it doesn’t work for everybody, but you just give it a try for seven days. Most people are not going to kill you. And so if you feel better, then you might want to keep exploring that sort of philosophy. If not, you move on, but it’s only like 20 bucks. So that’s amazing. I think I gave it to you for the show. Note the link should be there.

Abby (00:50:01) Yeah, yeah. I’ll include all the links in the show notes. I’m so glad that you’re offering that because as someone who comes from very much like the deep spiritual abstract world, that’s my zone of genius. And I saw that you’re doing all this stuff like this is perfect, so I won’t go and do stuff that is going to help you tremendously and will help you with all kinds of other work.

Nick (00:50:18) To make an e-course in the future together, maybe one to two wings on that bird?

Abby (00:50:23) Yeah. That’ll be great as well. Thank you Nick to do what you’re doing and we’ll talk soon

Nick (00:50:31) Awesome. Thanks for having me. Yeah.

SHARE THIS POST

Posted on Leave a comment

New Year Journey Pt. 2

New Year Journey Mind Body Free Podcast
New Year Journey Part 2 Abby Banner Photo

New Year Journey Pt 2

In episode 15: New Year Journey Pt 2, we move into part 2 of our New Year’s Eve series of saying farewell to 2021 and welcoming in 2022. In this episode, you will be guided through a Shamanic journey of releasing what you would like to let go of in 2021 and stepping into what you are creating in 2022. 

If you haven’t yet you can listen to Part 1 here.
 As you explore this visioning journey, I encourage you to approach it with a sense of play and discovery, as well as a pen and paper so you can answer the journaling prompt below after you’ve listened to the journey.

Journaling Exercise:

1. Listen to the guided Journey in Episode 15.

2. Journal what you have let go of in 2021. 

3. Journal what you are stepping into in 2022.

4. Have a magical New Year!

Connect with Abigail:
Facebook: @yourmindbodyfree
Instagram: @yourmindbodyfree
Schedule a free discovery call
Learn more about the Mentorship Program

 


 

Mind Body Free Podcast Love

Are you subscribed? If not, there’s a chance you could be missing out on some bonuses and extra show tools.  Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, or Spotify to be sure you’re in the loop.  

Do you love the show? If so, I’d love it if you left me a review on iTunes. This helps others find the show and get integrative healing support. Simply click here and select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review”. Thank you so much ❤︎

 


 

Full Show Transcript

Abby (00:00:00) Hello and welcome to the mind body for your podcast. I am your host, Abigail Moss. I am a healer, a coach, and a mentor. I help people to connect with their inner healers. Their passion and purpose and share their medicine with the world. And today it is episode 15 and this is part two of our New Year’s journey.

Abby (00:00:25) So if you haven’t yet done part one, which is episode 14, I recommend starting there because it’s going to make this next journey even more vivid and clear. We don’t have to do that one first, but it will help make this one even more powerful. So this journey that we’re going to go on today is all about moving into the ceremony of the rite of passage, of letting go of 2021 and stepping into 2022.

Abby (00:01:00) And with that, we let go of anything we don’t need to bring with us into this next year. And in doing that, we create space for what we want to welcome into 2022. So I hope you enjoy this journey. This is another live recording from one of my mentor classes. And again, you are going to want to have a pen and paper handy to do some journaling for the questions afterward. And I encourage you to give yourself some space to relax, to close your eyes, to sink into this because you’ll get the most from this journey that way. All right. So without further ado, here is our New Year’s journey.

Abby (00:01:44) So we’re doing our New Year’s letting go and calling in. We want to let go of 2021 and call in 2020 to journey. So let’s close our eyes and just imagine some light pouring down from above melting into you from the top of your head, down into your brain and eyes and ears, nose and throat.

Abby (00:02:09) Putting that light, fills all of your senses, and releases any blocks from seeing your divine path, you are inherently worth yours. You’re allowing that expression and confidence to flow through you and allowing that light to melt into your shoulders, your arms, and hands, relaxing everything that it touches and feeling and melting down into your lungs as you breathe it into your lungs.

Abby (00:02:42) I’m feeling a melting down into all your organs and your heart, your liver, your stomach and spleen, and your kidneys down through your intestines, melting into your hips and releasing any tension from your hips, feeling that light melting down like a warm smile into your legs, melting into your knees, going down your lower legs and into your ankles and your feet, and just feeling every part of you relaxed. Just letting go of any tension, any worry, any stress, any heaviness releasing that into the light.

Abby (00:03:22) Feeling like getting some tree roots coming from you and going into the Earth and going deeper and deeper and plugging in with a core of Mother Earth and feeling a pulsing life force, hearing the heartbeat of the Earth, feeling yourself sinking up with that now. And sending some gratitude to Mother Earth and feeling her sending some energy up your tree, roots up your legs, filling up behind your belly button. And overflowing up into your heart center and radiating out, filling your whole body, the whole room, you’re in, the whole building you’re in.

Abby (00:04:19) The whole city, the whole country, and the whole planet. Feeling yourself fully connected and supported from above and below and wrapped in a bubble of life. Good and bringing your awareness back into your hard center, now dropping into this space and feeling that pulsing life force there. And feeling yourself expand out every breath that you take as you inhale, feeling your heart center expand, and as you exhale, feel it coming back in, it’s moving with your breath. Good, don’t know you next inhale, leave the energy in your hearts under expanded out as you continue to breathe naturally.

Abby (00:05:15) Right, and we’re going to be moving into your timeline, we’re going to go into space where it’s light and time and work with this dimension. I want you to imagine now that an energy current is coming to pick you up and lift you. So you are just kind of there in front of you now and you can show a powerful home. It works while it can be a cloud of magic carpet or car or plane helicopter. I’m just imagining that you’re stepping on to that energy of current and it’s bringing you up into the sky above the Earth. Into a good web of light.

Abby (00:05:57) And as you look down, you can see the timeline for your life buried on Earth and imagine yourself now just standing on that timeline in your present day. And as you stand on that, it’s like standing in a line of light. And as you look behind you, you see the past as you look ahead of you, you see the future. And a little bit ahead of you, not too far, you see a line of light kind of a marker point in that line of light, says 20. Twenty-two. And I want you to think now of things you’d like to leave behind to let go of.

Abby (00:06:50 )Do not bring with you into 2020 to think of all of the things that you’d like to let go of as you move into this next year. This next part of your life? And I want you to look behind you and see all those things there that you like to let go of that can be recent or very far back in your timeline. Doesn’t matter. I just see them there now knowing that I can’t harm you. They’re just there in your awareness. And I want you to imagine now.

Abby (00:07:32 )There’s a bubble of light here and inside that bubble of light has an irresistible magnetic pull, all of that which you like to release before you move into the new year and just gently with a smile. I put all those old ways, old habits, patterns, and energies into that light to be transformed in that bubble of light. So everywhere that you felt that you resisted bringing a vision into reality, but that goes into that bubble where it feels scary to put yourself out there and make connections and miss all of that everywhere.

Abby (00:08:17) You had to figure it all out before it can happen or it’s all going to explode. Put all of that and that bubble of light. All negative self-talk and self-judgment are depreciation. Take all of that and allow the bubble of light to put in a release from you and create the lead in this story, all cords attached to any of that self-talk. Good. So whenever it feels like you’re not making progress, when a small setback happens, everything is put into that bubble of light. And create and delete any attachments and destroy any attachments to that.

Abby (00:09:04) You can see the depth and. And the power of the progress that you’ve made and feel that within, you know, that to be true, all regret, rigidity, complacency, and worry allow that to go into that bubble of light. Everything that kept you small put that in the rubble. Everything that holds you back releases that into that bubble. Everything that made you feel afraid, release all of that. Everything that made you feel unworthy, release all of that. I mean, the thing that said, you’re not enough and create in this story, all of that and you release it into the bubble of life.

Abby (00:09:56) I want you to imagine if there’s any other kind of orbs of light or of energetic frequencies that you sense and feel it’s not meant to come with you. That feels heavy and something to go where you’re going. Release all of that into that ball of light. And I want you to look at that bubble of light and just say thank you, thank you for all the ways that you’ve served me. Thank you for all the ways that you’ve helped me come to this moment in time now. Thank you for having me cope when I needed help coping. Thank you. Thank you for helping me to adapt when I needed help adapting.

Abby (00:10:44) And I want you to take a moment and decide right now if you would truly like to let this go and make space for what you’re bringing in in 2020. And feeling that inside of you and your heart feeling that, well, the power of actually truly deciding to let it go. And let the power of that decision break any cords or attach to that bubble. And imagine the sky of white above us, and we’re just starting to bubble into the light, seeing it moving on and. Merging with a light in five four three two one. Feeling raindrops of light, pouring down onto you onto your past and your future.

Abby (00:11:52) Blessing you and every part of you with the wisdom and healing from this experience. I want you to look forward to it now. Just beyond that line, that marker point of 2020, do you feel the energies of what you’re calling into this next chapter of your life? I want you to imagine stepping forward just before that line, before that threshold point. And looking into all those things that you’re bringing in, feeling all the energy of it, allowing it to grow and expand. Feeling yourself moving forward, ever so gently. I want you to before you step across that line to the side again in your heart. If you’d like to allow this, and if you truly would like to allow us to welcome this into your life and yourself.

Abby (00:13:02) Knowing that you are worthy and deserving of whatever your heart desires to create. I’m feeling now with that decision. And creating, deleting, and storing all fears. Feeling now with your decision. Because you feel it in your heart, I want you to step across that line into the threshold of 20 22. Just being in this energy of what you’re creating in your life. And one more time scene, the most vivid and vital and powerful scene for you to see now of this life that you’re creating of what you’re calling in and 2022 and being there in five four three two one.

Abby (00:14:06) And as you’re there now, are you inside or outside? Are you alone or is anyone with you? And if others are there, who’s there? It’s daytime or nighttime. What are you doing at this moment? What’s happening around you? And how are you engaging, if others are there, how are you engaging with them? And how are you feeling at this moment? And what are you grateful for? And if there’s one thing you’d like yourself to know. You like your parcel to know about how you created this, what would you like to know? OK. And

Abby (00:15:37) I think a symbol to appear in front of you, a symbol that is a powerful symbol for you, that will help you in creating this and bringing this into your life as an anchor for all of these energies that you’re calling into 20 22. And seeing that symbol in front of you now and welcoming it into your heart. Good and allowing this memory, this moment is feeling to stay with you, meaning you can’t remain in you and continue guiding you forward and your deeply fulfilling life.

Abby (00:16:20) Moving back to the present day, here you are before said before not quite yet in 2020 to feel the lightness in your timeline, the shift fueling the excitement of all that’s coming ahead and just allowing that current of energy to take you back to your body. Back to this moment in time on Earth and being there in five four three two one feeling fully present and alive in your body, you’re feeling well and relaxed and home imagining a set of stairs with five steps as you go on two steps five and four feeling light, feeling clear and easily recalling the details of this journey to on step three and two.

Abby (00:17:14) Feeling present, feeling calm and relaxed in your body. So the onus of one. And if you’re listening to this recording at night, just a moment and turning it off and having a deep, restful sleep that will take you all the way through till morning. And if you’re listening to this recording the day feels as if you just had a fantastic night’s sleep coming into full awareness, taking some deep breaths, feeling energy is circulating up your back and down your front through the microcosmic orbit.

Abby (00:17:49) Feeling your tree roots anchored into the Earth and feeling the energy circulating through your tree roots up your back and down your front. And clap your hands and have them create heat. When you feel that heat in the palm of your hands, cupping your hands over your eyes, bring the heat in through your eyes and down to your belly three times. I’m washing your face, head, neck, and shoulders and down your body.

Abby (00:18:30) All right. Thank you for going on that journey. I hope you enjoyed your ceremonial rite of passage from 2021 and 2022. All right. So now is a great time to grab a pen and some paper and do some journaling. From what you discovered in your journey, you can do a stream of consciousness churning, journeying about things that stood out to you, and just let that flow, which can be a great way of bringing the subconscious into your conscious awareness. And from there, I would then make two lists of everything that you’ve let go of that you’re leaving behind and releasing from 2021 and all that you’re stepping into in 2022 into this next chapter of your life.

Abby (00:19:21) So thank you so much for listening. If you have any questions, reach out. And if you’re curious about the mentor classes that these recordings are from a run for six months, we connect each week with really intimate class size, and together we heal, connect with our inner wisdom and purpose and share our medicine with the world. So if that sounds like something that is calling to you, you can learn more at mindbodyfree.com/mentorship. Registration for this class closes on January 13th.

Abby (00:19:57) So if you’re feeling cold, don’t hesitate to schedule a free discovery call and see if this is right for you. All right. Thank you so much. I’m Abigail Moss. You can reach me on Instagram and Facebook @yourmindbodyfree as well as mindbodyfree.com. And if you love this journey, I encourage you to share it around with anyone else you think may benefit from it. And if you like and subscribe and review the podcast on Apple Podcasts, that helps more people to find this kind of work. So thank you so much. Wishing you a beautiful, phenomenal, expansive 2022, and talk soon.

SHARE THIS POST

Posted on Leave a comment

Live Dream Coaching: Lisa’s Dream

05 live coaching lisa's dream
05 lisa'a dream

Live Coaching: Lisa's Dream

In this live dream coaching session, I guide Lisa through a process of understanding the deeper meaning held within one of her dreams. She unpacks powerful aspects of herself and her diverse family lineage as the wisdom of her ancestors and guides speak to her through her dream.

Connect with Lisa:
lisawongcreatingbalance.ca
Facebook
Instagram

 


 

Mind Body Free Podcast Love

Are you subscribed? If not, there’s a chance you could be missing out on some bonuses and extra show tools.  Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, or Spotify to be sure you’re in the loop.  

Do you love the show? If so, I’d love it if you left me a review on iTunes. This helps others find the show and get integrative healing support. Simply click here and select “Ratings and Reviews” and “Write a Review”. Thank you so much ❤︎

Looking for more support?

Schedule a free discovery call here

Learn more about my 6-month Mentorship Program here.

 


 

Full Show Transcript

Abby (00:00):

Hello, and welcome to the mindbodyfree podcast. I am your host Abigail Moss. And today I am speaking with the lovely Lisa Wong, who is gracious to be my guest today. We’re going to be doing some work together on understanding one of Lisa’s dreams and unpacking that and kind of learning a process of really discovering the deep meaning and rich insight and healing wisdom that our dreams can hold for us. So before we jump into that, I want to share a little bit about Lisa. She’s a beautiful teacher, a mentor, a healer. She is a spiritual intuitive coach and mentor author Reiki, master creator, and master of dragon path, energy healing, NLP, and CBT practitioner. Having experienced many facets of life. She has dedicated herself to her healing and understanding working in her own shadow and understanding the necessity of our shadow has brought her to this place of infinite healing. She’s honored to share her gifts with you as a coach, mentor, teacher, or practitioner as you walk your journey through this lifetime, just as a beautiful spirit guide and has a great sense of down-to-earth humor, which I appreciate, especially in the spiritual world. So thank you, Lisa. Welcome. Thanks

Lisa (01:25):

Abigail. It’s lovely to be here with you.

Abby (01:27):

Well, we have you, so you dream obviously to tell me about what dreams are like for you. You remember them often, do you have vivid dreams? What’s that world like for you right now?

Lisa (01:40):

Dreams for me have always been vivid. They have always been in color and for me, they are more representative of a journey, and there, not a lot of disconnection within my dreams. They’re usually quite fluid and how they transition. Some of them are very easy to understand and others not so much.

Abby (02:12):

Yeah. Sometimes there’s the one where it’s like WTF was that.

Lisa (02:18):

Those are the ones. Yeah. I am very excited about this cause I have a very interesting dream to share when we get to that point. So I’m excited about it as well. Cause I enjoy learning about myself and learning from people as beautiful as you as well. You

Abby (02:40):

Thank you. Yeah. When it comes to learning, I just feel like it’s a lifelong process and just getting to be around other people who are on this path is so fun. And it’s so exciting because I can talk about stuff like that. And then this. And then this just keeps sparking and more momentum and growth and it’s a lot of fun. Having been, you know, growing up as the weirdo and then meeting the other weirdos. It’s like, it’s great to be a weirdo.

Lisa (03:16):

I agree with that as well.

Abby (03:24):

Weirdos unite.

Lisa (03:24):

Let’s make it weird.

Abby (03:26):

Yeah, exactly. All right. So tell me about this dream. So this, this dream that you want to look at today is that a vivid dream or, A scary or colorful, or what was that dream life?

Lisa (03:42):

It was vivid. And my, I, I dream in color pretty much all the time. Cool. I rarely have a monochrome dream and this dream is really interesting because there were so many things transitioning throughout the dream and it went so quickly that, I am, I’m still trying to process the information, obviously it wasn’t, one of those dreams for me that was easy to go, I got the message on that one. This one is an interesting dream. And to be given with when the dream began, I saw this wall of clay in a building and it was interesting because the architecture was very ancient and there was this very smooth wall. And then I saw the face begin to form within the side of the wall, the face wasn’t frightening. It was there. And the wall was kind of a brownish color. It wasn’t dark brown, it wasn’t light brown. It was kind of brown and red and gold. And this face appeared on this wall.

Lisa (05:21):

And then it kind of went, I don’t know if you know what a cut, how a cut scene goes, where everything just kind of cuts and then you’re into a different scene. And this is what happened within this next scene. There was this face of this very young person, unaware of the sexual orientation of this person. Their hair was pulled right back off their face. So I couldn’t tell very large green eyes, very smooth, clear skin. And all I could see was the neck and the head, very pleasing to look at. And I felt that I wanted to connect with this person, this being right then. And it was almost that feeling of being greedy, to interact with this person, wanting to have that connection right away, and being impatient, that it couldn’t happen immediately. As soon as I had that understanding and my dream, we went to another cutscene where this person disappeared. And we went to another cut scene, which was a village and the village was built into the side of a mountain. And yet there was the ocean or a sea below it. And all of the buildings were made of clay and stone.

Lisa (07:00):

All of the people were dressed in very colorful clothes. And every person that was represented was different in coloring in the race, in the things they were carrying. It didn’t appear as if there was one specific type of person that was in this village. It was so eclectic and so amazing. And there was music playing in the background. And on one side of the street, it was one kind of music. And on the other side of the street, it was another kind of music. And there was no clashing of the music. They worked together. And after I spent some time there, I went to the last cutscene, which was the wall again with the door. And that’s when I woke up

Abby (08:19):

Making some notes furiously over here. Yeah. Like a quick it’s like, you’ve got a full movie download. That’s how my dreams are so interesting. I love it. It’s so interesting too. I find that when you pay attention to your dreams, they have lots to say, it’s like, you’re listening. All right. I have all this to tell you. Okay, what we’ll do is we’ll, I’m going to kind of make some notes for some key symbols in your dream. And then together, we’ll go into each symbol and start unpacking what it has, what that one means. And then it’s going to start making more sense as we look at each symbol, the other ones are going to make more sense too. Cause we’re going to get more context as we go. Okay. Okay. Cool. Beautiful. So you see, we started with the wall of clay in a building with ancient architecture and there’s a smooth wall where a face formed.

Abby (09:11):

So let’s just start with the building that you were in. And so something that I would kind of like to do, I don’t feel like it’s super necessary. Cause I feel like you’re a very connected person, but I think just connecting quickly with the light and providing the support of our guys and guardians as we go on this journey. So let’s just close our eyes real quick and just imagine some light pouring down from above. And I’ll take you through your head, your brain, eyes, ears, throat, arms, hands, and into your lungs, belly, hips, and legs. Just feeling that pouring down and just melting into you and feeling some tree roots, going into the earth and plugging in with a core of mother earth. I find that pulsing life force and feeling mother earth send some love up your tree, roots up your legs, into the center of your chest, and then feeling light, radiating out, filling your whole body, the whole room you’re in whole building in that light feel from above and then below filling the whole city, the whole country and the whole planet. And just feeling ourselves like connected and supportive from above and below and wrapped in a bubble of light and just the volume of support from our guys, guardians angels, and beings of light to work with us, to support and guide us and understand Lisa’s dream for the highest good of all. And creating a safe and sacred space to do so that dream just was like, woof, feeling it again.

Abby (11:07):

Yeah. There’s a lot there. I can feel that too. Yeah. As soon as you mentioned the face appearing on the wall, I was like, there’s some, well I can feel the tingles. Okay, good. So let’s become that building more and more energy as we talk. Do you feel that that’s great? Okay. So how it works is yeah. Lisa spanned herself. Okay. Got it. Because we feel you, So how it works is I’m going to ask you to become the building and you’re going to say as the building I am, and then give me three words to describe yourself and say I am, and then whatever three words come to mind

Lisa (11:59):

Like the building, I am strong, flexible, and supportive.

Abby (12:12):

Okay, perfect. And strong, flexible, supportive. What do you represent for Lisa? Okay.

Lisa (12:24):

For Lisa, I represent okay. Support that. Wasn’t always there in my understanding as I was growing up.

Abby (12:40):

And what messages might you have for Lisa? There was always support. Okay.

Lisa (12:57):

You have always been a person of strength and you have found kindness in being flexible in your understanding of your healing.

Abby (13:11):

All right. So we’re going to let that go for now when you just kind of wash that away with light. And I want to tune in with the face that forms in that wall and that smooth wall. So has the face, can you give me three words to describe yourself, facade truth, breakthrough energy, there, facade truth breaks through what do you represent for Elisa?

Lisa (13:58):

Yeah, that represents to me in accepting myself wholly and completely with all of the attributes that I have that make up who I am in my entirety.

Abby (14:17):

Okay. Perfect. And how’s the face? What messages might you have for Lisa?

Lisa (14:25):

Thank you for embracing all of your cultures. Interesting. They are as one. Yeah. I can feel that.

Abby (14:39):

Yeah. Beautiful. Whew. All right. They’re going to let that go for now. And we’re going to move to the next scene. So we had the cutscene where we went to the face of a very young person who was in the Trojan office and they had large green eyes and smooth, clear skin and they, and you wanted to connect with them, and you kind of felt impatient and almost Creedy about wanting to connect. So let’s become that person in that scene. So as that person, can you give me three words to describe yourself: patient, receptive, expensive, right? Patient X is receptive, expansive. What do you represent for Lisa?

Lisa (15:53):

The connection does not necessarily have to happen on the physical plane. Yeah. Thank goodness. The other interesting thing. It was a stop searching.

Abby (16:11):

Which is interesting to me. What did that mean to you?

Lisa (16:26):

I feel as if there’s a connection between a long-term friendship that ended in a not ideal manner and for a time wondering if I would ever be able to reconnect with another human being on that level of trust and security.

Abby (17:01):

And there’s, I want to kind of unpack that more, but I also want to keep going with the dream. So hold me back for now. All right. So I’d let that go for now. And let’s move into the third scene when we were in the village and built on the side of a mountain by the sea, and there were buildings made of clay and stone and all of these colorful people of all different cultures and races were in colorful clothes. And there was music playing from two different places. And it wasn’t clashing. It was working together. So let’s start with being the village. So as the village, what are three words you would use to yourself? Harmony allowing and opposites, right? Harmony allows opposites. What do you represent for Lisa?

Lisa (18:10):

The creation of the foundation that I have and accepting everything about who I am, who my family is, who my ancestors are, understanding that they have at times been on opposing sides of issues. And yet they came together in harmony at this one place at one time.

Abby (18:38):

Hmm. What a powerful thing. Do you have any messages for Lisa at this time as the village?

Lisa (18:48):

Something that I’ve been telling myself since I was a child, is that I fit wherever I am. There’s no need to fit in

Abby (19:00):

Wise words. All right. Now let’s let that go. Hey, so there’s the two songs. Let’s connect with one of the songs. So whichever one jumps into your mind first, and like that song, what are three words to describe yourself? Honoring ceremony, heartbeat, beautiful honoring ceremony, heartbeat. What do you represent for Lisa’s connection and what messages do you have for Lisa?

Lisa (19:42):

The first part that I’m receiving comes to me in a vision and it’s to go to the fire, to meet with the ancestors. And the second is the song of the Eagle, the Wolf, and the bear.

Abby (20:04):

Those sound like they have some deep significance for you. Is that a place where you’ve gone before to the fire to meet with the ancestors, or is that the first time that’s appeared in that vision for you?

Lisa (20:17):

One of my primary guides takes me to the fire.

Abby (20:22):

Yeah. Time to go do that. Maybe there’s a meeting on your calendar now with your guides. It’s a possibility. Beautiful. And then with the song of the Eagle Wolf and bear, are you comfortable sharing if you know what that means to you, have you, is that something that has been coming to you and visions before

Lisa (20:55):

Eagle is freedom? Wolf is intuition. Bear is strength. Mm, a powerful combination. Yeah. Beautiful.

Abby (21:14):

All kinds of tingles and chambers can feel the power of all that all of your grads are like right here. Whenever she’s ready. We’ll be here waiting for probably after we’re finished. Yeah. I was like, all right. You know, the memo now

Lisa (21:30):

Time to go into meditation.

Abby (21:31):

Yeah, totally. Okay. Beautiful. So thank you. So we can let that thing go. And let’s just kind of, I just want to ask you, and then we can unpack it a bit together. What that meant for you. Like what those scenes coming together felt like for you.

Lisa (21:55):

Two things had come to me. One was representative of my journey, from a place of beginning where the dream was into going to where I currently am and then maybe future casting a bit. The other thing that came to me is that there is an understanding about what community is socially and I’m not to get hung up on what community means as the dictionary tells us, the community is much more than that. And to expand into that. So

Abby (22:47):

Why is, you know, when you’re tagging, I just feel this sense of peace and calm. It’s like, Ugh, like all of the worldly things, it’s like, I just, like, I feel the perspective of your wisdom, but it’s just so nourishing to be in that field. So thank you. You’re welcome. Yeah. Especially during these times when there are all kinds of stuff in the field, that’s, you know, it can feel like a storm. It’s nice to be in that grounded presence of like I’m not to get caught up in what this says. Okay. So, yeah. And then, do you mind if I, I speak a little bit to what I saw as well in your

Lisa (23:29):

Dream. Okay, please, please. Am I excited to hear what you received?

Abby (23:34):

Yeah. Okay. So, and I’ve, I have kind of my notes here, so I’m just going to kind of touch on the notes and then talk a bit about kind of what it felt like on my side. So the building was this, strong, flexible support, and it didn’t always feel like it was there growing up, but the message that I had for you is that says, it said there’s always support and you’ve always been a person of strength and your kindness and flexibility in your journey of healing has created the strength in you. That’s beautiful. That’s so too. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you. And you know, the building was made of clay and things were forming in that building. So it’s like it holds you up, but it can still also be moving and dynamic. And the face formed in that clay, the words were facade truth and breakthrough, and it represented accepting yourself wholly and completely. And, the message it had for you was just thanking you for embracing all of your cultures. And they are all one. I feel like there’s a lot of energy and a lot of power in that last sentence that it shares with you. I want to cry every time I touch it because there’s a lot of energy there.

Lisa (25:02):

Motional Energy through the lineage.

Abby (25:07):

Yeah. I can feel that. It’s like, all I have all these ancestors behind, like all these ancestors connected to you there. I feel like they’re all behind me and they’re all like, they’re excited. She’s like, she’s doing it, she’s bringing it together. So we’ve always wanted them to do that. They’ve got very enthusiastic energy either. Quite nice. You know, as I know

Lisa (25:39):

I enjoy my time with them.

Abby (25:42):

I bet. Okay. And moving on to the next scene, you felt into that person, that androgynous person and they were patient receptive and expansive and the, they represented, this message, that connection doesn’t necessarily have to happen on the physical plane and to stop searching. And what I kind of feel into that is the sense of just kind of the mind, you know, on the physical plane, the physical plane mind opening up the higher self-connection. So the soul, you that’s connected to many other souls and dimensions and deep, profound beingness and oneness. And that sense of just reminding the mind here, the personality part, Hey, there’s this other part, you know, as you let go of searching, you’ll find what’s already here is kind of tell me where I’m wrong. There

Lisa (26:55):

It’s so interesting because there’s, I almost feel as if, when I do my meditations and I go, wherever I go, depending on what my intention is, and I’m looking for connection, I’m searching for connection on these other dimensions in these other planes. And I feel as if maybe that’s the messages when you go, just go to experience, don’t go to look for something you don’t necessarily, it’s kind of like going for a hike and going, well, I’m going to go for a hike and I’m going to look for a, something, and then going on the hike and not experiencing that, that you put the expectation on, and then maybe feeling disappointed instead of going on the hike to experience the hiking itself.

Abby (27:57):

And that’s a great analogy.

Lisa (28:02):

Thank you. But that’s how I’m feeling. This being, this person was about to stop putting an expectation on where it is. Yeah.

Abby (28:16):

Yeah. Cause in that, when you were sharing that part of that scene, you said that in the dream, you felt this wanting to connect with that person and this impatience about wanting to connect well when you turned in with them, part of what they embodied was patience and receptivity can expand that. That’s so interesting.

Lisa (28:37):

It’s like, yeah, chill out.

Abby (28:40):

I know it’s ironic. Sometimes the less we try, the easier it is like that. Good. Yeah. Okay, good. So moving into the next scene. So scene three was the village and its key. It kind of feels like this brings, brings it all together. In the first and second scenes and this one, the village itself represented harmony and harmony allowing and opposites. And it was on the foundation that the foundation of acceptance of your family, your ancestors who came together in harmony at this one place and one time, and the message for you here was that you fit wherever you are. There’s no need to fit in kind of yes. Yeah. And I, you know, it’s this, this kind of sense of wherever I am is where I belong because I belong to me.

Abby (29:49):

Yes, absolutely.

Abby (29:53):

And then there was, we connected with the song there. There were two songs playing in that village, but they were kind of playing, in harmony, like they were working together, they didn’t clash and they represented the honoring ceremony and heartbeat. And they were about connection. And they said to go to the fire to meet with the ancestors and the song of the EA and the other vision that came with that as a message was the song of the Eagle Wolf and bear, which represent freedom, intuition, and strength. So the next step, to have an action item from the streets.

Abby (30:35):

Yay. Here’s is your next task on your journey of life? Yeah, so it feels like a lot of it, the overarching feeling was, you know, you’re supported, you’re strong and you’ve built this strength through your flexibility and your kindness in your journey of healing. And that connection is, is there, it’s expensive, it’s patient, or it’s receptive. And, you know, connecting with this person, what you felt and connected with is already within you, you know, like that, that space, that, that sense of connection is already available to you. And with that song, there’s that heartbeat, that connection that comes in. And, and it’s telling you to go back to that fire to go to connect back in with the Eagle Wolf and bear.

Lisa (31:39):

And it’s interesting. Cause, one of my primary guides, his name is soaring Eagle.

Abby (31:46):

Beautiful. What a beautiful guy to have it

Lisa (31:50):

Is. And of course, he’s representative of my indigenous culture within my great makeup.

Abby (31:56):

Exactly. Yeah. I move. And when you, as you say that within my great makeup of me, like, I feel all of this so much power in that because there’s so much history and all these lineages, like there’s so much strength within each individual lineage and then also the strength in this union and harmony of coming together and learning how to do that. You know, the act of doing that is such a beautiful and profound thing as well.

Lisa (32:23):

And I honestly feel that a lot of my journey growing up is coming to terms with the diversity of who I am and the people in my lineage who came together to create this being that is me.

Abby (32:46):

Yeah. It’s quite beautiful. It is quite beautiful. Just a whole colorful, vibrant village. What an interesting place to be. I’d rather, I’d love to be there instead of, you know, the same Ville. Well, that does make for an interesting conversation. Yeah. Right. But when you know that I’m sure that wisdom and that perspective, you know, that, that grants you is something that is very needed in this world any time. But especially at these times.

Lisa (33:30):

I think understanding having experienced so many things in my life and coming to an understanding, even working through some of the anger that I felt towards people towards society when I was younger and bringing myself to a place of healing and understanding, and coming to understand the situation, the dynamic and giving and gifting forgiveness for myself and everyone else was very profound for me.

Abby (34:10):

If there is someone who is in that situation where they’re trying to reconcile different cultures, different backgrounds, or, you know, being in a clash among cultures, what would you say to them on their journey,

Lisa (34:34):

Be true to your heart first it’s to who you are, be understanding of yourself, allow people to have their opinions and their understandings, however, understand that that is not your truth, nor your reality. And by allowing people to have their understanding, that allows you to educate.

Abby (35:13):

I feel that whole resonance detangling down my body. Thank you. You’re welcome. Yeah. So how can people find you if they’d like to work with you, Lisa,

Lisa (35:26):

If people would like to work with me, they can find me on my website, which is www.lisawongcreatingbalance.ca They can email me at lisa@lisawongcreatingbalance.ca. They can find me on Facebook, @lisawongcreatingbalance, and on Instagram at @lisa.wong.creating.balance.

Abby (35:52):

Awesome. Yeah, I love it. Well, thank you so much for doing what you do, for being you, for being this part of this unity of all of these different eclectic peoples and histories, and for the unique wisdom and, and expression of you that you share with the world.

Lisa (36:19):

Thank you, Abigail. That is gratefully received.

SHARE THIS POST